Word has come down the wire to snake hq that there has been a bumper crop of Coachwhip sightings this year and reaidents are demanding answers.
Who is this extra slinky fellow? What business does he have in that field? Did i just see him eating a crispy half-toad on the side of Bee Cave rd?
It may come as no surprise to find out they are called coachwhips because they look like a whip. In olden times people in grim backwoods hollers ran with this and the urban legend became that they not only relished whipping unsuspecting travelers, but that, instead of slithering, they put their tails in their mouths and rolled around like old bike tires. Word had it that if you crossed their turf in no time at all you’d see him roll up on you to teach you a lesson.
Sadly, this isn’t real and they just slither around like every other legless homie. They do, however, raise their head up cobra-style when they’re out hunting. This allows them to peer down at any insect, mouse or reptile small enough to eat. They’ll even eat a small rattlesnake or some absolutely minging roadkill remnants.
They are harmless and venom-free but will defend themselves with some good old fashioned biting and pooping if you chase them down (they are fast to slither away) so don’t do that to yourself. Hiss hiss.