This is probably going to be a long post, but I wanted to share this because I think this is how I actually became an animal lover.
It started during COVID.
Back in 2020, my whole family went to my Masi ghar (my maternal aunt's home) in another state. They had constructed a new floor, so there was a family gathering. My mom, papa, sisters, cousins, everyone was there.
My Masi and Mausaji had also recently got a Labrador from someone they knew.
My cousins were big Tony Stark fans, so they named him Tony :)
And honestly, Tony was something else. The type of dog who always looked like he is the boss (btw he is a labrador still very alpha personality).
My board exams were supposed to happen in 2021, and my cousins were really good at maths, so my parents decided to leave me there for some time so they could help me study.
That "some time" became around five or six months because COVID lockdown kept moving.
Then on a random day Mausaji started getting sick.
Initially, everyone thought it was normal cold and cough. But after a few days, he tested positive for COVID.
This was early COVID time, so everyone was scared. Government people came and sanitized the house, people treated COVID patients like they were carrying some zombie virus or something. It was a very weird time.
And then after a lot of ups and downs Mausaji passed away.
Even now, I don't really understand how everything happened so fast.
During all this, I spent a lot of time alone at Masi ghar (house).
I didn't have a proper smartphone. I was in Class 10, and apart from an old Jio phone, I had basically nothing. So my daily life was studying, watching TV, and Tony.
I used to take him for walks every day. Sometimes in the morning, sometimes in the evening, sometimes multiple times.
I would randomly talk to him too.
"Tony, kya kar raha hai" (used to share my feelings)
Obviously, he didn't understand everything. But when you spend that much time with a dog, you start feeling like he does.
That was probably the first time I properly bonded with a dog.
Before that, I loved dogs. I had fed street dogs and named some of them in my area.
Later, Tony got parvo as well. My cousins and family took him for treatment, and thankfully, he survived. But I had already returned home by then (after being stuck at my masi home for more than 5-6 months).
And after coming home, something changed.
I started looking at every street dog differently (as a friend).
There was one female dog in my area. She was young and extremely active. The first time I fed her, she became friendly with me almost immediately.
I immediately named her creamy idk why but I did
Then I started feeding her regularly.
Then her mother also started coming (idk if she was the mother or not it's just my assumption).
Then another dog started coming too, who I think was probably the father.
Then there were two puppies (appeared after a few months).
Slowly, I had my own little group of dogs. 😂
(Creamy, mother, father and the two small puppies)
I regularly fed around five of them.
There were other dogs in the area too, obviously, but these were the ones I really knew.
And then the bad things started happening again.
One day, gov dog catchers came.
They took the mother dog.
My cousin brother told me she was gone. He also used to feed the dogs sometimes because we lived in a joint family, so he knew how attached I was.
I tried looking for numbers and ways to find her, but I couldn't.
Eventually, I had to accept that she was gone.
Then came the monsoon of 2022.
The two puppies
And especially Creamy
All suddenly disappeared.
I looked around everywhere.
Nothing.
I had even managed to get them some basic vaccinations, including rabies, and I genuinely thought they would be okay.
But they were just gone.
Maybe something happened during the monsoon. Maybe they went somewhere. Maybe they didn't survive.
I'll probably never know.
The father dog was still there.
Out of that whole group, somehow, he stayed.
Then later, another female dog(which i don't know who she was probably from a different area) had litter in my area.
Again, puppies (4).
And the mother left the area just after a few weeks.
So now we have the father and the new four puppies (and a few other dogs who visit just like the new mother dog)
And before anyone says, "Why didn't you get them neutered?"
Trust me, I know.
I know what should have been done. But I was young, there weren't accessible NGOs around my area, and I didn't have the money, resources, or independence to handle all of that myself.
Anyway, from that next group, two puppies survived.
And somehow, they are still around even today.
They've grown up now.
This year, another small black puppy appeared around my house.
(Now we have The father, two puppies who survived and this new gentlewoman)
She was probably three or four months old.
I honestly didn't know where she came from.
At first, she would just come near the house.
Then she started coming regularly.
Then I started feeding her.
And slowly, the same thing started happening again.
She started trusting me.
And I started getting attached.
That's when I realised something about myself.
After losing Tony from my daily life (he is still doing good), after Mausaji passed away, after the mother dog was taken away, after creamy and the two puppies disappeared, and after seeing dogs randomly come and go from my life...
I had created this rule in my head.
Feed them.
Take care of them.
But don't get too attached.
Because apparently, getting attached means one day standing outside and wondering where they went.
I still feed dogs.
I still know which dogs belong to which area.
I still notice immediately when one doesn't show up.
I still worry about them.
I just try not to let myself get too emotionally attached anymore.
Which is funny, because I don't think it's actually possible.
I'm not even specifically a dog person.
I love animals in general. Cats, cows, birds, dogs... I once even kept chickens and a rooster at home. (Both lived a healthy life)😂
Tony was probably the first animal that made me understand what it actually feels like to have an animal become part of your everyday life.
And maybe that's why I still look for the dogs that disappeared.
Even after years.
Sometimes when I see a dog from far away that looks slightly familiar, for a second, I genuinely stop and look.
Maybe it's them.
It never is.
But I still look.
