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u/Emergency-Raspberry9 21h ago edited 20h ago
He looks like he's ready to curse the Romanov family, with help from an albino bat.
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 20h ago
Rasputin had enough game though. He didn't have to force it as far as I know.
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u/BLADE_RUNNER_42069 20h ago
Also a foot long penis reportedly
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 20h ago
Which even still exists in a glass jar somewhere if I'm not mistaken.
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19h ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/TonginTozz 18h ago
Oh gosh it's been a long time since I've ran across that and still laugh at it.
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u/KentuckyWallChicken 18h ago
Yuuuuup, I’ve unfortunately seen a picture of it. Pretty sure the footlong wasn’t an exaggeration.
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u/InheritedHermitGene 19h ago
Aristocratic ladies threw themselves at him even though he was grubby and stank!
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 19h ago
I guess he had an reportedly massive incentive and his technique was also nothing to sneeze at.
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u/Emergency-Raspberry9 19h ago
A beard is a great accessory for certain tasks.
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 18h ago
Is it? I got a full b... I mean my buddy got a full beard and i never heard it was an asset in that way.
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u/Davido401 18h ago
Remember when the Tate Morontm posted a pic of himself in like swimming Y-fronts(dunno what else to call them, I hate the word panties, it disgusts me as a word, the word moist is more acceptable and also, here in Scotland we call them pants but for some reason Americans think they are trousers, weird people), and all his followers started accusing him of being trans and/or a Ken doll cause he was flat as flock down there.
Also while am moaning, the new body text typing area is fucking stupid, cause this sub has a "Read the Rules" blurb it makes it difficult for me to see what am typing. Silly mobile app, it seems to be just "how can we make it a worse user experience for folks today" or the behind the scenes folks are trying to justify their jobs.
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 18h ago
I'm german so english is my second language but I learned their name as "Speedos" which is the Ami term I think?
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u/Davido401 18h ago
Speedos!!!! I forgot that name haha although I bet Tate has them they'll be Speedo with the "S" missing haha
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u/SkunkMonkey 18h ago
I prefer Banana Hammock for the mankini.
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u/Davido401 18h ago
Oh he wasn't sporting a banana of any stretch, like ave got a teeny cock but even I have a bigger bulge than his fatness lol
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u/EggsceIlent 18h ago
To me, a peak alpha anything never has to announce it's like the boss or peak or alpha or whatever, man or woman
You just know. just like they just know. Confidence and charisma and actual ability in what they do all speak for themselves.
Like people sh*t talking on the basketball court vs players that just play and ball out
I don't gotta say anything, just look at the scoreboard homey.
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 21h ago edited 20h ago
I KNEW the only reason he shaved his stupid head was because he was balding.
Edit: Since there was some confusion, I'm on about his hypocracy about it. He regularily made fun of other guys hairlines.
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u/GottaUseEmAll 20h ago
It's the reason 90% of shaved-bald men shave their heads.
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u/thepresidentsturtle 20h ago
There's a massive subreddit that celebrates it.
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u/GottaUseEmAll 20h ago
I know, one of the most wholesome places on the internet.
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u/thepresidentsturtle 20h ago
So I'm not sure if we should be making fun of bad people for it. Especially when he has many undesirable characteristics to make fun of.
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u/pfannkuchen89 20h ago
We can make fun of him for being a hypocrite about it though. He’s mocked other men for bad hairlines, calling them names because of it.
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u/FlyOrdinary1104 19h ago
As a balding man, nah every insult hurled at that bridge troll is too kind for the awful shit he’s done.
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u/GottaUseEmAll 20h ago
I didn't make fun of him, or anyone else. I think it's a great way to deal with balding, if balding is something that bothers one.
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u/KokonutMonkey 19h ago
Go for it. We don't mind.
-Bald dudes.
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u/Mike_Kermin 18h ago
Harm from body shaming doesn't stop just because you do it too.
We're trying to build a better world, not copy the cunt in the picture.
The point was they're being critical of him being a cunt to bald men. Don't change that, we were at a good spot there.
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u/broanoah 17h ago
This is like trying to tell the NFL subreddits to get rid of fat shaming. I hope we can start being nicer to each other soon
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u/YeahlDid 21h ago
Yes, we all knew that.
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u/Dangerous_Trip_8905 20h ago
Pretty sure at some point Tate tried to claim he wasn't balding, he just liked the look. This was what exposed his lie
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u/Brvcx 18h ago edited 15h ago
Iirc, he also mentioned this photo how he had a full head of hair here.
I know there's a gazillion other things going on with this oxygen thief, but let's be real. That's far from a full head of hair. And I say this as a balding man myself.
Edit: deleted a word. Don't write comments when you're tired.
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u/Self-Comprehensive 20h ago
Well technically he shaves it because the implants look terrible. If they looked good, he wouldn't shave it.
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u/tommmmmmmmy93 20h ago
I get you don't like him but this is literally what all balding guys do lmao wtf is your point
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u/FriedrichWeedmann 20h ago
His hypocracy about it. He was calling other guys out for their hairlines.
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u/TKG_Actual 21h ago
That dude looks more like he sleeps behind a dumpster full of medical waste and asserts dominance by fondling fire hydrants.
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u/sjopolsa 20h ago
He looks like he just came out of 3 months hibernation at that spot.
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u/AnExpertInThisField 19h ago
I'm seeing Gollum's out of work uncle who "just needs a cave to crash in for a few weeks until I'm back on my feet. You won't know I'm here."
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u/Sancticide 19h ago
Spinoff of the Toxic Avenger?
He was 98 lbs. of solid nerd until he became... THE TOXIC MOLESTER!
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u/TheModWhoShaggedMe 21h ago
There's no such thing scientifically or in nature as an alpha male among the human species. It's a myth perpetrated by weak men.
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u/duesenjeffepic 20h ago
It doesn't even exist in wolves
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u/DivinityPen 20h ago
In reality, they're actually very tight-knit family units who go out of their way to care for their sick, injured and elderly. Even if they did have a supposed "alpha male," the ideal candidate would align towards positive masculinity (by animal standards anyway) overall.
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u/Questioning-Warrior 18h ago
As a wolf lover, it saddens me to see how so many toxic people misinterpret those creatures and use them to justify being aggressive and controlling. They should instead be seen as lessons for teamwork, family, and love (and perhaps fatherhood as well as male wolves help raise the pups, unlike "alpha male" humans who don't stick around for their children)
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u/TheModWhoShaggedMe 20h ago
Turns out that, in a room full of predators, they're all likely to feast.
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u/PyroIsSpai 18h ago
There's no such thing scientifically or in nature as an alpha male among the human species. It's a myth perpetrated by weak men.
With weak chins while wearing vintage Blanche Devereaux costumes.
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u/Worried-Pick4848 21h ago edited 21h ago
An alpha male looks like a slightly overweight dude because he enjoys his wife's cooking and he can fix things around the house and always has a smile on his face and is very gentle with children and sometimes annoys his teenage kids by signing his favorite songs on long road trips and will get up at 3AM to help someone he cares about to get out of a sticky situation..
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u/ForagedFoodie 21h ago
And has a good job but still supports his wife's career. They share household chores. His teenage kids know they can always call him if they need a lift out of a bad situation and he won't ask but he will be ready to listen whenever and if ever they want to talk about it.
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u/Forward_Rope_5598 20h ago
Idk man, Tom Holland is pretty skinny and his rendition of Umbrella is the most alpha shit anyone's ever seen
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u/JimboTCB 20h ago
Standard fit: polo shirt tucked into his cargo shorts and a fresh pair of New Balances with some white crew socks.
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u/Worried-Pick4848 19h ago
That, or a slightly tight-fitting suit that he bought 15 years ago, slacks and a solid colored button up and a tie printed with eggs on it..
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u/Capt0verkill 21h ago
This mf from middle earth?
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u/ProfilerXx 21h ago
Looks like the mountain troll in Harry Potter
Ugly Bastard
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u/FireBreathingNun 19h ago
Don’t insult the mountain trolls he has much more charisma.
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u/Mercerskye 20h ago
Pretty sure that's the dude I see badgering people for spare change to fix his spaceship...
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u/Both-Cry1382 21h ago
Is this a shot from a lord of the rings movie? I never watched the movies so i don't know.
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u/xlri8706 20h ago
Looks like a rat honestly.
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u/Spare-Dig 17h ago
Idk, rats are kind of cute. I can’t really think of an equally ugly creature as Tate, but it undoubtedly has mange.
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u/I_Shit_My_Pantaloons 20h ago edited 20h ago
Bro is literally a goblin he could be cyraxx's brother
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u/auunie 20h ago
Yeah, plus his supporters think a caricature face that looks like a shovel is "maxlooking".
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u/Unlucky_Air6125 20h ago
Yes, that's an alpha male!
The only thing is, that ppl that call themselves alphas are the biggest losers you can find.
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u/Ok-Chest-7932 19h ago
So he definitely ran into Dracula during his time in Romania huh? Got himself a little bit of the nosferatus going on there.
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u/barndawe 19h ago
Alpha in the sense of half finished and rushed into production before it's ready, sure
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u/Every_Association45 18h ago
I've seen doormats more alpha than this guy. IDK what to call this special kind of degenerate, but I do know what kind of treatment would be appropriate for it.
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u/Das_Autobot 20h ago edited 20h ago
Look at me. LOOK at me. That's what I look like if I don't shave my face or head for a couple of weeks. I guess I'm the Alpha now.
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u/AwkwardArtGuy 20h ago
Hey this is really mean! Comparing gollum to this guy is an insult to my boi Sméagol!
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u/SCR_RAC 20h ago
"The Alpha males from each territory dash at each other, stop short, vigorously nod their heads and turn around. They will repeat this process, increasing the distance each time until one stops. Males mark their territories with dung piles, and cover the females' dung with their own."
Unknown.
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u/TimeturnerJ 19h ago
Yes, that is in fact a perfect representation of the "alpha male" demographic.
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u/Alicewithhazeleyes 19h ago
I mean, dude is ugly and I’m saying that is a woman but it’s very obvious that this picture has been filtered because nobody has forehead wrinkles that disappear in a smoothness, 3/4 of the way across
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u/CuntersGameDungeon 19h ago
He looks like a painting of a mythological character being evil looking back at someone who witnessed their sinful act.
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u/OverallMembership709 19h ago edited 19h ago
he looks like one of those blind creatures that eat spelunkers.
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u/ConsistentDiamond108 18h ago
If you’re 14, and wanking 6 times a day, then yes, this is an alpha male to you.
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u/momobos1978 17h ago
and there are still people standing up for this abomination...and there are people who did exactly what he was preaching...and wanted to be carbon copy of him...and they called it masculine pattern of behavior...mhmmm
just what he was spreading trough out the world is reason enough to keep him locked up for the rest of his life(at least in my opinion)...pathetic poisonous man
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