r/cats • u/InternationalCook418 • 11h ago
Mourning/Loss saying goodbye…
I am absolutely devastated writing this. my baby girl jessie is being put down on thursday. i am distraught. she’s turning 16 next week and has been the most beautiful, supportive angel since i was 12. i picked her out of her litter when she was 8 weeks old and we have been best friends since.
i’ve struggled with my mental health growing up and she’s always been there right by my side during my manic and depressive episodes. she sleeps on my bed every night until recently when she got sick… she has a cancer lump and it’s huge. she can barely walk and she hides away all day and night now. she also rarely eats which is so out of character for her. i can tell she’s in immense pain.. i am trying not to lose it but i dont know how i will cope come thursday evening…
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u/norahhh1102 11h ago
She was so lucky to have been loved by you for 16 years. Sending you both all the love in the world❤️
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u/Life_Consequence_676 9h ago
Yes, please know you're not alone. I don't know if that's helpful, but we have all felt this way too when faced with the end of our furbabies' lives. It's heartbreaking and you'll grieve. There's no way around it, sadly, but it's the price we pay. So much love from such sweet souls, and we never have them long enough. I'm so sorry. 💔
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u/Cartoon_theoriest_99 11h ago
I know how you feel! Saying goodbye to a pet can be pretty hard… when I had to say goodbye to my old cat Tiger I was so sad and upset
You can start by spoiling your kitty a lot more than usual! Give her a little bit of whip cream, give her a lot of treats, snuggle with her and just spend time with her
You’ll get through this I promise
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u/Bootes_Void_ 11h ago
I know how you feel and i am sorry for you! Its hard but we have to go on, never forget them and learn from their love to be a better human.
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u/Arthur_Teddy 10h ago
She is such a wonderful baby... She has known love her entire life.
You said she is in terrible pain... she loves you, and I'm absolutely positive she knows that you will always choose what leads to her having the best and happiest time. If her pain is incurable in all other ways, which it sounds like it is, then... unfortunately, the best way to help is to give her relief from her pain. She will still love you. She will still trust you. And she will still live forever in your heart.
But I understand the horror you're feeling of her not being there 😔 Please reach out to all of your loved ones and make sure they know and will be there for you.
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u/MuchGrounded 10h ago
I’m so very sorry. You gave her a wonderful life and purpose. This is the worst part of loving a soul cat. The price of great love is deep grief. Go easy on yourself.
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u/ChinaCatProphet 9h ago
From the pictures I can see Jessie is a beautiful cat and you're a wonderful human. Finding each other is a gift, and losing each other is very painful. The gift remains.
Grief is the price we pay for love. You've said that she's in pain, letting her go is the greatest act of love you can give her. In time you'll feel less sad and feel more of the happiness of knowing her.
Much love to you both. Tell Jessie to keep a look out for my black and white girl Sylvester and her grey, tabby brother Sid. They're up there and I still think about them years later. Like you, my cats got me through tough times.
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u/t0nguesurf3r British Shorthair 10h ago
16 years is a brilliant age for a cat ❤️ it’s clear she’s had such a fulfilling and loving life with you. those first few days are going to be hard but i hope you find some peace in knowing she won’t be in pain anymore. keep some of her fur, her paw print and keep it with you. you can get some beautiful keepsakes made and that way she will always be with you. sending you all the love and strength
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u/AggravatingBreath800 10h ago
Sending you both so much love 🖤🤍 Thank you for sharing her beauty with us.
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u/Bless_u-babe 10h ago
Wow you had her so long she was such family for you. I feel your great sadness and tears come to my eyes writing this. Just know there are SO many of us who completely understand and are holding you with virtual hugs. Allow yourself time and let the tears flow. 🥲💔
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u/Nauseabundomundo 10h ago
i’m so sorry. i know this won’t bring her health back, but i thank you for giving her the best life you could, and for giving her the best last days filled with love, she will always be with you, her love will always be endless. all my love and a hug for you.
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u/lnc_5103 10h ago
I'm so sorry. We are in the final days with our sweet 16 year old girl too (also inoperable cancer on her shoulder and hip) and I keep having to remind myself it's the most loving, selfless decision we can make when it's time. We are able to take away their pain and suffering and make it our own. It's truly a gift but that doesn't make the decision any easier to make.
Hang in there.
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u/Square_Imagination27 10h ago
I had a Norwegian Forest Cat that could’ve been her twin.
I’m so sorry you have to go through this. She’ll be waiting for you on the other side. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
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u/june-orchid-1234 10h ago
That's so sad that you have to lose your precious baby girl but if she's in pain and unhappy you are doing the right thing. I hope you can come to terms with the situation and not get overwhelmed with grief.
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u/icantpickausername3 10h ago
I lost my dog Ella recently who I also got when I was 12 and it’s like you’re describing word for word my situation. She was also 16, also had cancer, and also couldn’t walk towards the end. Letting her go was so incredibly hard but I knew I was doing the right thing for her as I’m sure you know you are doing the right thing for Jessie. Honor her memory in any way you can and let yourself grieve as much or as little as you need to. Feel no guilt over this as she trusts you to make this decision for her and you are doing the right thing by not letting her suffer. Sending you hugs
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u/AcanthocephalaWide89 10h ago
I’m not gonna lie it is very hard but remind yourself that there isn’t anything you can do and you are protecting her from a painful death. I have had to tell myself this…
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u/hlvr25 10h ago
Omg. This pain is so immense and I have been there. I was totally gutted. You’re making her be able to rest easy. I know it doesn’t mean much to hear, but when you look back after some time, this is how it will feel and all you’ll have are the cherished memories of her life with you and the love you shared with less and less pain as time goes on.
I’m so sorry for your loss. Such a sweet baby. There are plenty of our beloved babies waiting for her across the 🌈 bridge.
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u/brobastian0227 10h ago
She has been there for you for every up and down. What she needs now is for you to be there for her one last time. You will know when it's time, going out on a good day sounds much better than waiting too long and suffering. I know this isn't easy and I wish you and your buddy all the peace and love in the world. If I could pause time for a week, to give you a little more time, I would.
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u/Mrtoyhead 10h ago
I’m so sorry she is sick and is going to somewhere better. I am going through the same thing. We have a 20 year old female calico that is in the final stages of renal disease. It could be this week as well. If it’s any conciliation I’ll be thinking about you and her.
My profile is real and that is a picture of me. If you need a friend look me up. Peace
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u/Spadge1974 10h ago
She is a part of your world, but remember you are her whole world. What a beautiful girl, you have given her a perfect life.
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u/sunshine_sprinklez 10h ago
You are so lucky to have had each other. In your youth she guided you with that internal wisdom and gentle love that cats seem to possess without any effort. You’re growing up, and now it’s your turn to take care of her. She has known nothing but your love for sixteen years, but that’s changing. She is sick and she’s starting to know pain. You are giving her the greatest gift you possibly could, an act of mercy out of the gratitude for all she gave to you. You will always belong to each other. A cat who has seen you through so much will always be a part of you. In your grief you are taking her pain, so she can go to sleep in peace. Thank you for sharing her with us 💙
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u/Margolem_in_Ibiza 10h ago
I am so sorry you are having to prepare to say goodbye to your baby girl. As others have said, you are doing this out of love for a sweet and kind soul who has been there for you when you needed that kind of love. I have been where you are and I know you are in pain for Jessie. Let her know you love her in the time you have remaining and remember that goodbye is not forever. She will always be home in your heart, and watching over you when you need her. You will meet again. “The ones we love never truly leave us.”
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u/Ambitious-Confusion6 10h ago
So many poor kitties out there never got the chance to be loved and apart of a family. She was so blessed to have you from start to end. She will always be there in your heart and will love you forever. I lost my Gracie a year ago and I miss her every day but I know she's up there playing and chasing mice in the Rainbow Bridge.
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u/LowPresentation8231 10h ago
So pretty. 💔 I’m sorry for you. Jessie and her love for you will live forever. I wish you peace.
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u/Low-Apartment3165 10h ago
We had a cat who lived to be 21. She was my daughter’s cat since 4th grade. That same week, a young pregnant feral cat showed up in our back yard. Prepare to be sad, but also be prepared for the CDS.
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u/dukeofpancakes1 9h ago
Girlie ik how it feels to loose a beloved childhood pet. Pls give her lots of kisses, pets and scritches. Spoil her rotten in the last moments and be there for her when that day comes. I can tell that kitty was loved so so much.
Jessie is loved to the moon and back 💙💙
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u/Lemonlimecat 8h ago
I am so sorry — the photos of you with Jessie show so much love. Jessie is such a beautiful cat. I wish cats had longer lives as it is so painful to lose them. The love you share is eternal
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u/KristyNoemsZombieDog 9h ago
Tuxedo cats are the best. I had to put mine down after 13 years due to cancer. Same thing, picked him out of the litter at 8 weeks and he was my best friend ever since. I lost him 3 years ago and still think about him daily. At first it was hard because it hurt so much. Now I look back at him fondly and hope that someday i'll get to experience another best cat buddy.
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u/ogskillet 8h ago
Had to do this Saturday. She was 16 too. It was sudden and unexpected. Still second guessing everything. I know the feelings you’re wrestling with. Try to remember you’re doing the right thing and you gave her a wonderful life.
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u/Echoed_In_Silence American Shorthair 8h ago
Aw. She’s a cute loving cat. And the photo of her on her back is so adorable. It’s clear to see you have her the best life. I hope she looks down and purrs at you from cat heaven. Sending cat hugs 🤗
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u/ZRufus56 6h ago
so sorry to hear. Remember the great times together and cherish those memories always. Your first beloved pet will always have a unique bond. It’s a blessing you both have time together this week.
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u/kasant 2h ago
I’m sorry you’re going through this. It will be very hard but by putting her down you’re showing her another act of love. I try to remember that grief hurts so much because we loved someone so much. It doesn’t make it hurt less but it helps to give meaning to the pain. Sending you a big virtual hug for Thursday.
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u/JournalistFew6829 2h ago
We always just want more time with them. We all know what you’re going through and feel your pain.
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u/Safe-Sail9335 9h ago
You are in Hell right now. Nothing will help except to just record videos of the two of you ,just being together. .I held mine in a sling while I walked her around her fave place on the roof ,we watched sun go down..My whole body shut down after I made appointment. The next few days were like slogging thru mud ,trying to keep my composure around my lil baby..my sincere 🙏. Condolences..your darling will visit you as you fall asleep..
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u/faberkyx 8h ago
she looks a lot like one of my cats... it makes it even more sad... sending hugs to both of you
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u/Sure_Ad_3552 7h ago
Sending you all of my positive vibes. She’s so lucky to have lived the long happy life she did with you, and vise versa. Taking on the burden of this decision is something all pet parents have to face, and you are really brave and have a lot of love for your fur baby by putting her first like you are. Best of luck to you on Thursday 💞
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u/No-Membership3214 6h ago
Sorry for the sad news, fly high over the rainbow bridge Jessie. 💔🌈🐈⬛💔🌈🐈⬛💔🌈🐈⬛
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u/Tnoire7 5h ago
I am so sorry 😿
They know how much you love them, and I believe we will see our babies again someday, as the rainbow bridge poem goes ♥ They will be waiting for you when that time comes.
My house is never empty; I always keep adopting more. I'm not replacing those who came before; I am growing the family. That way, when more kitties have to make their trip, they have family waiting on them to share stories and play with to keep them company till our time comes. Plus, so many places here are always full of kitties; they need more people to adopt. So many need love, homes, and everything they deserve.
I know it's not easy to say goodbye, but it's not forever; it's just for now.
My husband said it best: "We gave them a home, a safe place, lots of love till God called them back to his home, because he missed them. Now he cares and loves them while we care for others and love them till God calls them home; we will see them again someday. Till then, let's help, love, and protect all those we can till God calls us home too; then we will be reunited."
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u/megared17 10h ago
If she's in pain, think of it as you taking on pain so she doesn't have to anymore. Yes it will hurt. Its the burden cat parents take on.
She's had 16 years of love and attention from you. And she gets to go while being comforted and loved.