Randomly opened the files app of my husband and it immediately opened to a sex video of him and an ex in a car. My heart dropped and I went through other things in the app and noticed over 30 photos/videos of 2 of his exes that were opened at different times in the past year. I obviously confronted him and he was extremely remorseful and cried and apologized more than a thousand times.

For context, my husband and I have always had a very fun banter filled relationship, he has always been my best friend and we always told each other that we are the happiest couple in the world, we can’t imagine other people being happier than us. I am close to his whole family and extended family. I have always tried to be the best and most perfect wife to him, always had sex with him, always tried making different dishes to surprise him. I have had really bad relationships in the past so this was my way of putting in the effort because I understand how precious a husband wife relationship is and I always with my whole heart loved him.

When I confronted him about it, I honestly went bat shit crazy on him and he took it all gracefully. his excuse was it was backed up and he didn’t really go through it, I then went into the meta data and screenshotted the times that he actually last saw it and he said it was nothing and he was just looking for something else on his files app and he really loves me and it was just a slip in his character. He has been extremely remorseful since I found out and told me that he will try his hardest to make my pain go away and make sure he would be the best husband that I deserve. He told me that I am his world and those girls mean nothing to him but I just can’t help comparing myself to those girls. Those videos were extremely graphic and it hurts so much although they were taken years ago, what makes me question this whole thing is that why would he see them (even though he was scrolling through his files app and looking for something else).
Why didn’t he just delete them. I asked him how would he feel if he saw videos like that of me with my ex and I am actively seeing them. Truly from the bottom of my heart, I felt sick even saying that but I wanted him to understand how I felt. I could never imagine even looking at images of my ex like that, the thought of that disgusts me.

Those two exes of his are currently married and have no contact with him. It just angers me that I honestly wouldn’t like it if I were them. It’s just such a big shock for me to process.

Anyways, I am sick of feeling this way and I just want this pain to go away. I feel like I’m making a big deal out of this when I should just let it go but those images keep popping up in my head. I want to genuinely forgive him because of his remorse. He told me he would be a better husband and this goes against everything he stands for. He always follows rules and is a gods man and he told that I am valid for being angry and he will wholeheartedly make me feel safe and loved and it is on him to make this better.

Please advise me on how to let this go.

I'm using a throwaway account for obvious reasons.

I'm 17 and I've been dating my boyfriend for two years. We've been sexually active for a year of our relationship and we've always been very cautious with protection and consent and everything.

My mom didn't know we were active but she was getting something out of my bag and she found condoms. She came to me screaming and she kept saying she couldn't believe anyone would actually want to have sex with me because I'm so ugly. She got dad involved too and he kept saying all I was good for is sex anyways because I don't want to be a housewife like my mom and it was so awful.

My dad has gone pretty much back to normal but my mom hasn't talked to me in four days and I don't know what to do. I just want things to go back to normal, I know she won't get better.

Long story short, my mom crashed my car outside my house back in June. I stopped talking to her because my car ended up being totaled, and everyone basically said I was materialistic and selfish. To this day, I still haven't received the money from the insurance. Anyway, during that time, she went behind my back and tried to move in with my sister, who has a partner and kids. I didn't know about this until recently; I asked her, but she kept denying it. Well, my sister has been applying for multiple houses and even asked my other siblings if she could add them to the applications. They both said no. Apparently, my sister got approved for a house but doesn't have the deposit to move in. They asked my dad for $5k. My dad gave me large sums of money to put away back in 2020 when he had COVID, and I have had that money since then. I asked my dad a few months ago if it was okay for me to put that money in a high-yield savings account and he said yes. Well, during Labor Day weekend, all my family met up and my mom clearly told my sister that they were going to try to get the money out of my dad. Mind you, my dad already helped her one time with the same situation. She asked him for $4k and he gave it to her. Then she lost a car and my dad sold her an extra vehicle he had. She only paid half. Years later, the car got impounded because of expired tags. They just got back and they want the money. I told them that the most I have in cash is $1,000 and the rest is in accounts. My mother clearly got upset and said that my sister is coming Wednesday to pick up the money because the landlord wants the funds on Thursday to secure the deal. I'm upset as well because she didn't tell me beforehand so I can either start looking for a smaller place or figure out out a way to get the extra money each month.

Throwaway because yeah. I (19M) live with my mother (56F), who has been divorced from my father for 10 years. My mom works primarily as a photographer for modeling agencies. Recently, my mom was away for work and I was home by myself. My mom has a personal laptop that she always takes with her, and a desktop that she allows me to use if I need to. I wanted to order something online, so I put the password in the desktop and opened it up.

When it opened up, it showed an open tab of an adult content website with a video playing. It was a woman having sex with multiple men one after the other, and they were all wearing those masquerade masks. For the beginning of the video the woman was on her back spread eagle with the men going on top of her, and the camera was focusing on her private/butt area, so I couldn’t make out the face. Eventually they changed positions and her face was more clear, and I realized it was my mother. I also recognized the men because I’ve gone to some of my mom’s work parties. They are models in their mid to late 20s.

I closed the tab and haven’t spoken about it to her. Obviously she didn’t mean to leave this open. But I’m still in shock with what I saw and what I now know. If this is part of how she puts food on the table, I don’t want her to be ashamed of it. Advice on how to move forward would be nice.

M33 F30 So here I am, sitting here trying to figure out what the hell I’m supposed to do.
My girlfriend and I had a cruise planned together. Everything was paid for, the trip was something I was genuinely looking forward to, and I thought we were going to make some great memories together.
Then I found out she cheated on me right before the cruise.
I honestly don’t even know how I’m supposed to process that. It’s one thing to have relationship problems, but finding out someone you trusted was with someone else completely changes the way you look at them.
Now I’m stuck with the question: Do I give her another chance?
She says she’s sorry and wants to work things out, but I’m having a hard time figuring out if I can actually trust her again. I know people make mistakes, but cheating isn’t exactly something that happens by accident. There were choices made along the way.
Part of me wants to forgive her because I obviously cared about this person enough to plan a future with her. But another part of me keeps thinking, If I forgive her, am I just setting myself up to get hurt again?
At this point, I’m seriously considering just walking away and starting over.
I’ve even been thinking about moving to Vegas. Maybe I need a fresh start somewhere new. New city, new people, new experiences, and just focusing on myself for a while. I’ve spent enough time worrying about relationships and other people. Maybe it’s time to work on myself, travel, have some fun, and see where life takes me.
And then there’s the funniest part of this whole situation…
I already paid for two people on this damn cruise. 😂
So now I have a cruise booked for two and potentially nobody to go with.
Which brings me to the absolutely insane part of this post:
Does anyone want to join me? 😂
Obviously, I’m not seriously expecting some random person from Reddit to immediately jump on a cruise with a stranger. But honestly, life is weird, and at this point I’m open to meeting some cool people and making the best out of a shitty situation.
I’d rather take the trip, enjoy myself, meet new people, eat way too much food, sit by the ocean, have a few drinks, explore the ports, and make some memories than sit at home feeling sorry for myself.
Maybe this whole situation is a sign that I need to stop holding onto something that isn’t good for me.
So I’m asking Reddit:
Would you give your girlfriend another chance after she cheated right before a major trip you planned together?
Have you ever taken someone back after they cheated? Did it actually work out, or did you eventually realize you were better off leaving?
And if you were in my position, would you take the cruise alone, invite a friend, or say screw it and start a completely new chapter?
Because right now I’m seriously considering Vegas + a cruise + a fresh start.
Maybe getting your heart broken is sometimes just life’s way of pushing you toward something better. 🤷‍♂️

UPDATE: It’s officially happening. I’m packing my shit and running. 😂
After everything that’s happened, I finally made the decision. I’m done sitting around overthinking it and wondering “what if?” I’m packing up my stuff and starting a new chapter.
Honestly, it’s a little scary, but at the same time, I feel relieved. Sometimes you just have to say screw it, take the leap, and see where life takes you.
I don’t have every single detail figured out yet, but the plan is officially in motion. New place, new surroundings, new memories, and hopefully a lot less bullshit. 😂
I’ll keep you guys updated as this unfolds. Wish me luck because apparently I’ve officially lost my damn mind. 🤣

I wear glasses as I'm short sighted and have been all my life. It's quite expensive for me to get glasses as I have a high prescription. Last month I got a new pair for the first time in two years and paid the usual eye watering amount.

Two weeks ago I got asked to come into the office for a meeting with HR. I didn't take my union rep as I was at a bit of a loss what it was about and there wasn't time (I did email him though). Basically someone complained that I was wearing meta glasses - I'm not. The HR assistant I was meeting with told me I had to go without glasses (I can't see without them) or get a new pair (not financially reasonable), when I offered to show him that they were just normal glasses he got flustered and said he couldn't verify that and that he'd have to record me as 'non compliant'

I've emailed him and my rep to state that I'm not wearing meta glasses but all I've had from HR is that I must attend a further meeting today to address my escalation of non compliance. This all seems mad, I'm wearing perfectly ordinary glasses but no one from HR will look at the damn things.

What do I do?

Edit: I'm a woman in her 40s working in the UK

​I (25F) have been with my fiancé (30M) for two years. We are deeply in love, share a great life together, and plan on getting married. The only major problem is that our sex life is deeply unfulfilling, and I am starting to feel miserable.

​When we first had sex, he lasted around 15 seconds, and I thought at the time that it was due to nervousness. Throughout the time we have been together, this has not improved much. My fiancé consistently lasts under a minute in bed, and I am unable to orgasm.

​In my last relationship prior to this one, the sex was amazing. We were together for three years and both of us only stayed in the relationship that long because of the sex. It was adventurous, intimate, slow, fast, varied in positions, exciting, and made me feel sexy. I feel guilty that I often find myself fantasizing about what sex used to feel like. I am so sexually frustrated I find it bleeding into other parts of my life. I absolutely love and adore my fiancé, and couldn't ask for a better guy. We work well in life together and are looking forward to a future together. We love each other very much and I want to spend my life with him. The only problem is, I don't know if I can spend my life being this sexually miserable.

​The best part of sex for me is penetration. I like to try different positions and I want to feel intimate with my partner. Above all, I want to feel desired and sexy. My fiancé does not really initiate sex. Around bedtime, he usually asks me "what are you thinking". I usually laugh and say that I'm thinking I want to have sex. He grew up Catholic and I can tell that saying sexual terms and talking about sex makes him uncomfortable. I have asked him if he thinks his upbringing contributes to his shyness around sex, and he says no.

​The sex is always the same. It’s the same three positions and none of them feel great because there is no burning passion or lust involved. He doesn’t make any noise. He is very concerned about pleasing me, and gives great oral, but there is no "finesse" in his fingering. It is more about getting the job done and less about the experience and connecting. I do not prefer oral or fingering, and I have told him so. He respects my wishes when I say 'not today' with these things.

​I have tried several things to figure out what kind of sexual things he might be into. I have done the "lingerie under a trenchcoat", mood lighting, dirty talk, and many other things that men have typically liked in my experience. He found all of them slightly strange and not sexy. I outright ask him at least once a month if he has any sexual fantasies or things he wants to try, and he just says he wants to please me. When I tell him that I like it rough and soft, he says he doesn’t like it rough and that BDSM or any type of submission play is weird. When I told him that I like my ass slapped, he started doing it softly while I'm cooking and asks if I like it. I gently tell him that it would turn me on if he did it out of sexual desire, not doing it and waiting for my reaction without being interested in it.

I will note that he does not watch porn and doesn't know what many sexual terms mean (such as BDSM, before I told him).

​I am a decent looking person with a good figure and I receive compliments from other men, but the only man I really want to look at me with lust doesn’t. I think he finds me sexy, but his body language and his eyes don't show it, and it makes me sad and feel disconnected. He is also a very fit, good looking man and I tell him all of the time how handsome and sexy he is.

​I want an exciting, toe-curling sex life again, and I am afraid I will never have it. I have been struggling for two years now on how to broach the subject that he doesn’t last long enough because I fear it will make him self-conscious. I already wonder if he isn't that into sex because he can't last and I don't want to make it worse.

​Has anyone had a similar situation?

​How can I fix a situation where this man has low sex drive and doesn’t last?

​How can I re-find the type of sexual connection I am looking for in my relationship with my fiancé?

​How can I have the discussion about him lasting without making him self-conscious?

TL;DR: I (25F) love my fiancé (30M) and our life together, but our two-year sex life is deeply unfulfilling. He consistently finishes in under a minute, lacks passion or lust in his body language, and finds my attempts at romance or trying new things "weird." Meanwhile, I'm left sexually frustrated, unable to orgasm, and constantly missing the deep, adventurous connection I used to have. How do I bring up his stamina and lack of drive without shattering his confidence, and can this be fixed?

A few weeks ago my (20M) parents came over to my place to visit for a weekend and I had left my notebook out on the counter since I had a grocery list on the page that was open.

I have been going through a pretty rough patch in my life the past few months. I fell back into several addictions (weed, nicotine, and porn😕), and as I’ve been trying to knock these habits, I’ve been journaling a lot.

This weekend, my dad sat me down and confessed that he went through that notebook when they were over and saw some stuff about what I am/have been going through. Neither of my parents have ever known about any of this stuff going on in my life, so I’m sure it was quite a shock to them.

I think my dad was really just trying to help, but I’m 20 years old, moved out, and fully independent, so I’m kind of pissed that he thought it would be okay to go through my shit. Additionally, he would’ve had to have flipped like 20 pages back to find any of the stuff he talked to me about.

There were things in there that weren’t meant for anyone else to read that are incredibly embarrassing, and now I feel super ashamed of myself. I can’t even look at my dad anymore without just imagining what he thinks of me. It feels super shitty and honestly is making quitting these addictions even harder.

Tbh, I don’t really know the point of this post. I’m kind of just ranting but if anyone has any advice or has been through a similar thing and could help make me feel better, that would be much appreciated.

okay so my brother (12) started a couple of years ago with this fear of what seems to be any mention of human biology. it first happened when his class were learning about veins and arteries and he said that he just started to picture the blood going around in the arteries and got really dizzy. since then it’s happened multiple times where he’s been sent home for it. arguably the strangest moments being when he’s thrown up at school during an assembly on mental health because they spoke about the brain - not even like in a medical way. we’re unsure how to even support with this because he can’t be getting sent home from school every biology lesson (even happened in an RS lesson once). plus he of course needs to learn the content anyway for general required knowledge of life and exams. it’s at the point now where we can’t say words with relation to things without him getting anxious.
any advice on how to support him would be greatly appreciated!!

edit: also forgot to mention that it’s obviously a concern with regards to healthcare in general, say if he ends up needing a blood test one day.

I (F25) have been with my boyfriend (M27) for a while, and I need advice because I genuinely don’t know what to do with this situation.

I grew up poor in a large family in a small European country. We never went on holidays, and for most of my childhood, I had never even left my own country. As I got older, travelling became incredibly important to me. Now that I earn my own money, travelling is probably the thing that brings me the most happiness.
As a child, I was also severely bullied. During that time, reading became my escape. One particular children’s book, set in New York, became incredibly important to me. It was my comfort during one of the darkest periods of my childhood.
When I finished that book, I had one dream: to visit New York one day.

New York remained my biggest dream throughout my childhood and teenage years. I watched shows set there, including Gossip Girl, and the city always stayed at the top of my bucket list.
When I met my boyfriend, that dream changed slightly. He had never been to New York either, and I told him that my dream was now to experience the city together with him for the first time. The idea of us both discovering it together was very important and sentimental to me. He knew exactly how much the city meant to me.
Recently, we spent weeks looking for an affordable destination for our first holiday together because we don’t earn much money (we’re both in between jobs currently). We finally booked a relatively cheap trip.

Only two weeks later, my boyfriend was discussing a trip with three friends. One of them jokingly suggested New York, but my boyfriend told me something like, “They often have crazy ideas, but this probably won’t happen.” So I genuinely believed it was just a joke.
Two days later, the trip was booked.
My boyfriend is now going to New York with his friends.
What hurts is that we spent weeks searching for the cheapest possible trip for our first holiday together, but he booked a dream trip to New York with his friends within a day. He is also experiencing his first long-haul flight without me, despite knowing how important it was to me that we experienced New York together for the first time.

Eventually, I accepted it. He offered to let me come with him and his friends, but that isn’t what I wanted. I didn’t want to insert myself into their trip. We agreed that we would go to New York together next year instead.
He even suggested that I make a list of specific activities I wanted to do in New York so that he wouldn’t do those things with his friends. That way, we could still experience something there together for the first time.
I made the list, and he promised they weren’t planning to do any of those things.

He leaves tomorrow. Today, I asked to see their itinerary.
One of the activities on their itinerary was the exact same activity I had put on my personal list.

So now, even the compromise he suggested himself has been broken.
I don’t think my boyfriend needs my permission to travel or that I should control where he goes. But we have always talked about having dreams and goals as a couple, things you imagine and work towards together. For me, that was New York. For him, one of those dreams is skydiving, and I would never choose to do that alone or with a friend because I know he wants to experience it with me.

Question is, what do i do now?

I 27F have been dating my 40Mbf for about 5 years now.

We moved in together about 3 years ago and everything had started out okay. As time progressed things started to feel very transactional and less like it was a relationship. My love language is acts of service so every morning I get up before him and I used to prepare his coffee for him. During one of our arguments (it was more of a tough conversation about our relationship and how we can improve) he told me he didn’t like when I did his coffee for him like fill the water reserve, put the new k cup pod in and put a mug there so that in the morning all he has to do is press down the lid on the pod and press a button.

When we get groceries and he asks me what I want … I learned the hard way not to tell him because then he comes back with a receipt saying I can etransfer him for my portion whenever… as if we aren’t eating the same food.

Things progressed and we started having sex less and less because it was physically hurting me. Every-time I said no he would shut down and say everything was fine and just be short with me… and this goes on for a while maybe 5 days max and then he would try again and the same thing would happen. Sometimes when I do say no he guilt trips me into saying yes and then he gets what he wants and goes back to “normal” yet I feel like I’m nothing. I’ve brought it up with him and said he manipulates me into changing my mind and he’s like “mmmm more like guilt trips but yes I do” and I have never been able to let it go. I feel like I can’t say no because he’s either going to be pushy and make me change my mind or he’s going to be passive aggressive and I have to be scared and hyper vigilant all week. It makes me have a very much SA victim mindset even though it feels like a totally different situation and I don’t know what to do.

I work late because I don’t want to go home. But we do have a dog so some of the tension is cut.

He is not the kind guy I thought I loved and I just want to go back home to my mom but I don’t know how to tell her without feeling like a failure or like I disappointed her of like I’m not actively trying to be an adult and solve my open problems.

Everytime I speak with my mom on the phone she always says “you don’t sound happy”. And I always just brush it off with an excuse. I keep thinking that I have to be okay out in my own, but I need to leave. But I also don’t want to add any extra stress or worry to her.

I think I'm just so scared to take the steps to actually leave and I don't know what to do or how to approach the situation.

Please let me know your thoughts, opinions or hard truths.

I was coming home from a concert one night and got lost and ended up getting the wrong station back. My stepdad picked me up, and when I got home I was really tired, so I went straight to sleep.

When I woke up, I realised my stepbrother had been masturbating while looking at me while I was asleep. He immediately started begging me not to tell anyone and said he would pay me if I kept it a secret. I was crying and telling him to leave, and I called my mum and told her what happened.

Afterwards, I started thinking about some other things and wondered if this might have happened before. My bedroom door gets stuck on the carpet, so it doesn’t always close properly. For several days before this happened, I had been waking up and noticing that my door was slightly open. I always thought my dog had pushed it open, but afterwards I started wondering if my stepbrother had been coming into my room.

For a few days after what happened, he stayed at his aunt and uncle’s house. But eventually my family started treating things like they were normal again. My parents kept telling me that I should forgive him.

He hadn’t properly apologised to me, but I was told that I should be the bigger person, and that families are supposed to forgive each other. They also kept explaining that he has ADHD and that his mum died when he was two, so he’s had a difficult childhood and isn’t mentally okay.

I understand that he’s had difficult things happen to him, but I don’t know why that means I have to forgive him or pretend I’m comfortable around him.

I haven’t spoken to him since it happened.

The biggest problem now is that I don’t feel comfortable in my own house. If he’s downstairs, I usually don’t want to go downstairs. I don’t like going into the kitchen when he’s there, and I don’t feel comfortable sitting at the dinner table with everyone. It’s got to the point where I feel like I’m avoiding parts of my own home because he’s there.

We’ve had arguments about it because I kept trying to explain how uncomfortable I am. I also admit that I’ve handled some things badly. At one point I threatened to tell everyone what he had done because I felt like nobody was listening to me. I regret doing that, but at the time I felt completely ignored. I later found out that my mum had already told my extended family what happened. They live in another country and some of them even visited us afterwards. But none of them contacted me to ask if I was okay. They basically just told me that I should forgive him because we’re family.

Then I turned 18 in August. I went on a solo trip to Asia for my birthday, which I paid for myself. When I came home, I thought my family might have planned something for me because it was my 18th birthday. There was nothing. No cake, dinner or proper birthday present. They said that some shampoo, conditioner, a power bank and other travel things they’d bought me before I went away were my birthday present.

I know this probably sounds silly compared with everything else, and I don’t expect expensive presents. It just really hurt because I’ve already felt forgotten since everything happened.

I also went on a short trip to Paris with a friend, and my stepdad gave me 100 in my currency. I started thinking about how my stepbrother would probably get more than that for his birthday, and I brought it up with my parents. We had a small argument and I went upstairs.

Ithink the birthday situation just brought everything else back up. I feel like I’m the one who has had all the consequences from something that happened to me. He gets to carry on living normally in the house. I’m the one avoiding the kitchen. I’m the one who doesn’t want to sit at dinner. I’m the one who feels uncomfortable around my own family.

I don’t want to forgive him, especially when I don’t feel like he’s genuinely apologised or taken responsibility for what he did. But my family seems to think that I should just forgive him and move on. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. I still live with my family, so I can’t exactly avoid the situation completely.

What should I do? How do I set boundaries with my family when they expect me to forgive him and act like everything is normal? And how do I make living at home feel comfortable again?

My boyfriend (21m) and i (21f) have been together for around 1.5 years now. Our relationship has been near perfect apart from one issue. My boyfriend likes to save photos and videos of girls on instagram and tiktok to masturbate to. I told him clearly at the begining of our relationship that this is not something I’m comfortable with him doing in our relationship. In the past year I have found out he’s continued to do it on a number of occasions. Each time he apologised, promised he wouldn’t do it again and then has done. We were long distance for the first year of our relationship so I sort of understood. Fast forward to around 2 months ago, he moved in with my family at our house. I found out last week that he had been doing it again whilst living with me, including going into the bathroom to do it before a shower whilst i’m in the bedroom. I got so close to breaking up with him after this one but I told myself and him that he had one last chance and after that we’re done. Well last night I found out he had been doing it again. This time I said we’re done for good. He said that he has an addiction to it and was even in therapy before we got together for it. But I don’t understand why you would leave it to when we’re breaking up to tell me the truth. I kind of feel like a horrible person for breaking up with him for an addiction. He’s sleeping next to me now and once he wakes up he’s going to be leaving and I likely won’t ever see him again. Am I making the right decision in leaving him or should I try and help him through this together?

I’m a 17(f) and my boyfriend is a 17(m). We have been together for 9 months and I still have not had a full conversation with his mother. Compared to my parents, my boyfriend has met them, talked to them, and been at my house numerous of times. My mom and I go eat at restaurants with my boyfriend/ we take him out with us basically whenever we can. My mom really likes him. But it’s completely different with my boyfriend’s mom. She has never shown interest in me nor hasn’t ever tried to talk to me even though I’ve been with her son for 9 months. I’ve never been rude or disrespectful to her. I’m allowed to go over to their house but im not allowed in his room, which is fair and I don’t mind that. My boyfriend and I usually just stay in his basement playing on his Xbox or watching movies but it gets extremely hot in there since it has no A/C or windows. A few days ago I was over at his house and we decided to go into his living room since his younger brother was using his computer in the basement so we didn’t want to disturb him, not to mention again it was pretty hot. We weren’t being loud or even had the tv on as we were just on our phones and his mom called him to ask where we were. He told her we were in the living room and she got extremely angry at us and told us we needed to go into the basement and I wasn’t allowed in any other part of the house. We both were quiet when she said “I know both of you heard that, get the fuck downstairs”. So of course we went back to his basement. I was really embarrassed and upset because she has never told us anything about me not being allowed in his living room. I was also upset because I don’t understand why she doesn’t like me or hasn’t tried to get to know me at all. I understand it’s her house, her rules but the times I have seen her I always say hi or wave at her and she completely ignores me. She will walk past me like I didn’t exist or even look at me. I really don’t understand what I’ve done wrong and I don’t want her to hate me.

Is there anything at all I can do to try to get her to like me? Or at least have a good conversation together. I don’t know just something… I was thinking that maybe because we are teenagers that she isn’t putting any effort into getting to know me since she doesn’t think we are going to be together forever. This is also my very first relationship so maybe this is normal? I just get treated completely different than the way my mom treats my boyfriend. Any advice is greatly appreciate.

I am a senior in high school, i just turned 18. The freshmen in question is 15. We can call him Calvin (fake name)

I met Calvin right at the beginning of school. To be honest, I had a hallway crush on him for the first week or two, before we ever spoke. He’s extremely tall for his age and looks older, but the second we actually started speaking and i found out his age, i lost all interest. He is an interesting person, and i wave to him in the hallways when i see him.

I have been in the GSA at my school since middle school. This year, we got an a bunch of incoming people to the club, all freshmen. From my knowledge, Calvin is queer and also doesn’t seem to have a lot of friends. I invited him into the club until the assumption he’d be able to make friends within it.

Here’s where things are getting weird. We exchanged instagrams so i could message him the details of the club, and he talks to me nonstop, and in a sort of crushy way? Here are some examples:

-He constantly starts conversations with me. I try to keep these conversations short, since i’m very aware how weird it is for me to be ‘friends’ with someone his age. But no matter how many 1 word responses i give him, he keeps the conversation going.

-he sends me reels constantly. He once sent me a video “pranks to try on your crush”, then tried one of the pranks on me the next day

-he sends me goodnight texts (this started only a few days ago)

-Saying (very unprompted) that he is very mature for his age and wants to date someone older

-bringing up wanting a girlfriend and relationships extremely often, even when they are barely relevant to the conversation

Among many other small things.

Anytime he does something weird, i try to subtly reemphasize that i am much older than him. I also try to make it extremely clear that i have a boyfriend, in case that will help him back off.

there’s part of me that thinks he’s just a lonely kid talking to whoever will respond, which is why i’ve avoided ghosting him completely. I don’t know if i’m doing something wrong here. Should I stop talking to him completely? Or keep up with these almost 1 sided conversations he has with me.

I’m hoping once the club starts up, he’ll make some friends and leave me alone more.

TLDR: A freshmen is making not so subtle hints at having a crush on me

So my best friend Mia and I have been close since college, like six years now. She started dating this guy in May, and last week she told me they're getting an apartment together. I was a little surprised because it's fast, but that's her choice, not mine to judge.

The problem is she asked me to co-sign the lease with her. Her boyfriend has bad credit from some stuff before he met her, and Mia's credit isn't strong enough on her own either. She said it would just be a formality and that I probably won't ever have to actually pay anything.

I make decent money and my credit is good, so I get why she asked me. But I've read that co-signing means I'd be legally responsible for the rent if either of them can't pay, even though I'm not living there and have zero control over the situation. If they break up or he loses his job, I could be on the hook for thousands of dollars a month for an apartment I don't even live in.

I really don't want to say no and make things awkward, since she's genuinely one of my closest friends and I know she's counting on me. But I also don't want to put myself in a financial mess over someone else's relationship, especially one that's this new.

Has anyone been in a similar spot? How do I turn this down without it wrecking our friendship, or is there a middle ground I'm not thinking of? What would you actually do here?

I'm 16F who's really introverted. I just transferred to a prestigious University, and recently i feel like my brain just can't function/think. I'm an average student in my previous school. I don't participate in any recitations at all or even volunteer being a leader and since i'm already studying in a University, i wanna at least improve/get recognitions, etc.

My problem is that whenever i get called in recitation or get asked for ideas, something like that. My brain just has the inability to think or form a thought (if that makes sense). I just feel so humiliated because everyone surrounding me is smart and i get intimidated by them. On top of that, i tend to overthink a lot. I just can't help but to overthink that they're judging me while presenting in the front or do any kinds of public speaking and being a loner doesn't help either, it just feels like they just acknowledge my presence after being overlooked.

To add more information, i don't eat breakfasts that often. I don't know if this has any relevancy to this topic but i feel like this play a part in this. I just need any advice that can help.

So, me and my gf decided we want to try anal for the first time. Do you have any tips in general for it to go smoothly and some thing that we need to do. Also any advice is apriciated.

We have never tried anything before in that area so we are complete begginers.

Thanks in advance.

Edit: i am 23m and my gf is 23f

I'm 31m.

I have a bachelors in Information Systems, I chose to do business because I thought it was safe with an IT related focus because I've always been good with computers and figured there would certainly be jobs in it.

Wrong. I never found a job in my field, because well I didn't really specify a field. I taught English in Japan on a program I wanted to go on. I made some money and spent years learning Japanese to fluency.

Since covid happened my whole life structure fell apart.

I've worked menial, low paid jobs since. I failed to move to a city and struggled for years.

I finally moved 2 years ago. Despite it, I've worked in hotels, an office and an admin type role.

I've likely made more money in the last year of work than ever before, but it is still way less than the average or median where I live.

My relationship of 4 years is now over. That was my entire life plan just suddenly gone.

Practically it also means, I now only have my income to survive off. My rent and bills have doubled. And now I am living below the poverty line, despite working full time.

So I'm 31, single, no house, no assets, spending half my paycheck on rent, exhausted from working full time, don't have close friends, nobody is messaging me, no community, inner city apartment with nothing nice nearby.

I just wanted a good job, a loving partner, a comfortable home, pets and eventually kids in my 30s.

If I stay on the current path I'm on I won't have any of that in the next 10 years.

I really, really don't want to hit 40 in the same position I'm currently in.

I desperately need a new job that pays 30-50% more, a better place to live, and ideally a car as well.

I need to get qualified, even if it takes years, to have a higher income potential.

Most of all, I need to get out there and meet people, make new friends, and meet new women.

What are some practical steps I could take today to get me where I need to be in the next 5 years?​

i wanted to get me something to eat and ive been craving mcdonald’s and i only had 3 dollars so i asked my sister for 3 more dollars for a 5 dollar meal and she gave me it. i was gonna ask my mom to bring me to mcdonald’s but she was asleep so i called my sister and she door dashed me and my brother some food i didnt ask to get him anything just something for me. my mom was awake by then and she saw us get our food and my brother gave her a burger and she was complaining how she wasn’t thought about but i didnt have enough money to feed the entire family and we started getting into a fight and she called me a selfish cunt and kept saying how she wasn’t thought about. mind you we are poor and we don’t have anything to eat here. and she won’t me to not bring me to my sisters to wash my clothes we don’t have a washer and dryer. and now i dont have anybody i dont have anyone to go to for help i just want to get away from her please tell me how. i dont have a job im only 15 i dont have a car or permit or license

I have really bad avoidance issues. I've never been in a relationship, only went on one real date in my life, ghosted guys when they started flirting, and even cried when a guy I liked gave me his number because I was so stressed out ( I'm 20F if it matters, and this has been something I've noticed since I was about 15). It makes me feel like a terrible person, and I want so badly to change and to finally open up, but I don't even know where to begin or why I'm like this. I hate the way I act, and I feel guilty for it all the time, but I don't know what to do. Anyone have experience overcoming avoidant attatchment problems?

I moved into a new place that happens to have a ton of crows. I think they're really cute, plus I see them eating rats outside the building (port city) so I thought I'd buy unsalted, shelled peanuts for them. Now when I drive out of my parking lot, I'll toss peanuts out my car window and they go nuts and all start swooping down. My car is a really bright/unique blue, and I watch them follow me down the road in my rearviews, flying with peanuts in their beaks!! It's super cute, but over the past few days I've noticed a LOT of crows hanging around the parking lot. I've been feeding them for a couple weeks, but lately it's apocalyptic levels of crows. 😭 I adore them and don't mind feeding them, but I am starting to wonder if there might be some negative consequences to summoning a ton of them.

I’m 20F from Germany. I recently took a short weekend trip to Turkey with my boyfriend, and I’m back in Germany now.
My parents are strict Muslims and are extremely against me having a boyfriend. They are especially against my current relationship, to the point where my dad might disown me if my boyfriend and I eventually marry or take the relationship further.
My family has an apartment in Istanbul. I’m generally allowed to be in the apartment, but the keys were with a friend of my dad’s who was traveling at the time. I didn’t have money for a hotel, and my parents had recently told me that they were struggling financially and didn’t really have money anymore, so I didn’t want to ask them to pay for a hotel.
Because I couldn’t get the keys, I called a locksmith. I originally thought he would be able to pick/open the lock, but he ended up having to break the apartment’s keyhole/lock and replace it with a new one.
Afterwards, I confronted my parents and told them about the situation. They were obviously very unhappy and told me that what I did wasn’t okay.
Now they are demanding that I be honest about who I was with in the apartment. I know they strongly suspect it was my boyfriend, and they are threatening to ask the building’s security to check the CCTV footage if I don’t tell them the truth. I’m worried that the cameras could show my boyfriend entering or leaving the building.
The bigger issue is that I’m scared of what happens if they find out. My dad might contact my boyfriend’s family and confront or threaten them. I’m worried that this could create a huge conflict between our families and potentially cause my relationship to end, even though my boyfriend and I don’t want that.
I feel completely trapped. If I lie and they somehow get CCTV footage, it could make everything much worse. But if I tell them the truth, I’m scared that my dad will involve my boyfriend’s family and things could escalate from there.
I know getting a locksmith and replacing the lock was not a good decision, and I’m not trying to justify it. I’m just trying to figure out what the smartest way to handle this situation is now.
What would you do in my position? Would you tell your parents the truth, refuse to answer directly, or try to handle it another way?
Also, does anyone know how CCTV/security footage works in Turkish residential complexes? If my parents ask security whether someone entered the building, would security actually be allowed to show them the footage or confirm what they see?
I’d especially appreciate advice from people who have dealt with strict/religious parents, controlling family dynamics, or relationships that their parents strongly opposed. I’m 20, so I know I’m an adult, but I’m trying to navigate this without causing a situation that could affect my relationship or put my boyfriend in the middle of a conflict between our families.