r/SuicideWatch Sep 03 '19

New wiki on how to avoid accidentally encouraging suicide, and how to spot covert incitement

Upvotes

We've been seeing a worrying increase in pro-suicide content showing up here and, and also going unreported. This undermines our purpose here, so we wanted to highlight and clarify our guidelines about both direct and indirect incitement of suicide.

We've created a wiki that covers these issues. We hope this will be helpful to anyone who's wondering whether something's okay here and which responses to report. It explains in detail why any validation of suicidal intent, even an "innocent" message like "if you're 100% committed, I'll just wish you peace" is likely to increase people's pain, and why it's important to report even subtle pro-suicide comments. The full text of the wiki's current version is below, and it is maintained at /r/SuicideWatch/wiki/incitement.

We deeply appreciate everyone who gives responsive, empathetic, non-judgemental support to our OPs, and we particularly thank everyone who's already been reporting incitement in all forms.

Please report any post or comment that encourages suicide (or that breaks any of the other guidelines in the sidebar) to the moderators, either by clicking the "report" button or by sending us a modmail with a link. We deal with all guideline violations that are reported to us as soon as we can, but we can't read everything so community reports are essential. If you get a PM that breaks the guidelines, please report it both to the reddit sitewide admins and to us in modmail.

Thanks to all the great citizens of the community who help flag problem content and behaviour for us.


/r/SuicideWatch/wiki/incitement


Summary

It's important to respect and understand people's experiences and emotions. It's never necessary, helpful, or kind to support suicidal intent. There are some common misconceptions (discussed below) about suicidal people and how to help them that can cause well-meaning people to inadvertently incite suicide. There are also people online who incite suicide on purpose, often while pretending to be sympathetic and helpful.

Validate Feelings and Experiences, Not Self-Destructive Intentions

We're here to offer support, not judgement. That means accepting, with the best understanding we can offer, whatever emotions people express. Suicidal people are suffering, and we're here to try to ease that by providing support and caring. The most reliable way we know to de-escalate someone at risk is to give them the experience of feeling understood. That means not judging whether they should be feeling the way they are, or telling them what to do or not do.

But there's an important line to draw here. There's a crucial difference between empathizing with feelings and responding non-judgmentally to suicidal thoughts, and in any way endorsing, encouraging, or validating suicidal intentions or hopeless beliefs. It's both possible and important to convey understanding and compassion for someone's suicidal thoughts without putting your finger on the scale of their decision.

Anything that condones suicide, even passively, encourages suicide. It isn't supportive and does not help. It also violates reddit's sitewide rules as well as our guidelines. Explicitly inciting suicide online is a criminal offense in most jurisdictions.

Do not treat any OP's post as meaning that will definitely die by suicide and can't change their minds or be helped. Anyone who's able to read the comments here still has a chance to choose whether or not to try to keep living, even if they've also been experiencing intense thoughts of suicide, made a suicide plan, or started carrying it out.

In the most useful empirical model we have, the desire to die by suicide primarily comes from two interpersonal factors; alienation and a sense of being a burden or having nothing to offer. These factors usually lead to a profound feeling of being unwelcome in the world.

So, any acceptance or reinforcement of suicidal intent, even something "innocent" like "I hope you find peace", is actually a form of covert shunning that validates a person's sense that they're unwelcome in the world. It will usually add to their pain even if kindly meant and gently worded.

How to Avoid Validating Suicidal Intent

Keep the following in mind when offering support to anyone at risk for suicide.

  • People who say they don't want help usually can feel better if they get support that doesn't invalidate their emotions. Unfortunately, many popular "good" responses are actually counterproductive. In particular, many friends and family tend to rely exclusively on trying to convince the suicidal person that "it's not so bad", and this is usually experienced as "I don't understand what you're going through and I'm not going to try". People who've had "help" that made them feel worse don't want any more of the same. It doesn't mean that someone who actually knows how to be supportive can't give them any comfort.

  • Most people who are suicidal want to end their pain, not their lives. It's almost never true that death is the only way to end these people's suffering. Of course there are exceptional situations, and we certainly acknowledge that, for some people, the right help can be difficult to find. But preventing someone's suicide doesn't mean prolonging their suffering if we do it by giving them real comfort and understanding.

  • An unfixable problem doesn't mean that a good life will never be possible. We don't have to fix or change anything to help someone feel better. It's important to keep in mind that the correlation between our outer circumstances and our inner experience is weaker and less direct than commonly assumed. For every kind of difficult life situation, you will find some people who lapse into suicidal despair, and others who cope amazingly well, and a whole spectrum in between. A key difference is how much inner resilience the person has at the time. This can depend on many personal and situational factors. But when there's not enough, interpersonal support can both compensate for its absence and help rebuild it. We go into more depth on the "it gets better" issue in this PSA Post which is always linked from our sidebar (community info on mobile) guidelines.

  • There are always more choices than brutally forcing someone to stay alive or passively letting them end their lives.

To avoid accidentally breaking the anti-incitement rule, don't say or try to imply that acting on suicidal thoughts is a good idea, or that someone can't turn back or is already dead. Do whatever you can to help them feel cared for and welcome, at least in this little corner of the world. Our talking tips offer more detailed guidance.

Look Out for Deliberate Incitement. It May Come in Disguise.

Often comments that subtly encourage suicidal intent actually come from suicide fetishists and voyeurs (unfortunately this is a real and disturbing phenomenon). People like this are out there and the anonymous nature of reddit makes us particularly attractive to them.

They will typically try to scratch their psychological "itch" by saying things that push people closer to the edge. They often do this by exploiting the myths that we debunked in the bullet points above. Specifically you might see people doing the following:

  • Encouraging the false belief that the only way suicidal people can end their pain is by dying. There are always more and better choices than "brutally forcing someone to stay alive" or helping (actively or passively) them to end their lives.

  • Creating an artificial and toxic sense of "solidarity" by linking their encouragement of suicide to empathy. They will represent themselves as the only one who really understand the suicidal person, while either directly or indirectly encouraging their self-loathing emotions and self-destructive impulses. Since most people in suicidal crisis are in desperate need to empathy and understanding, this is a particularly dangerous form of manipulation.

Many suicide inciters are adept at putting a benevolent spin on their activities while actually luring people away from sources of real help. A couple of key points to keep in mind:

  • Skilled suicide intervention -- peer or professional -- is based on empathic responsiveness to the person's feelings that reduces their suffering in the moment. Contrary to pop-culture myths, it does not involve persuasion ("Don't do it!"), cheerleading ("You've got this!") or meaningless false promises ("Trust me, it gets better!"), or invalidation ("Let me show you how things aren't as bad as you think!"). Anyone who leads others to expect these kinds of toxic responses, or any other response that prolongs their pain, from expert help may be covertly pro-suicide. (Of course, people sometimes do have bad experience when seeking mental-health treatment, and it's fine to vent about those, but processing our own disappointment and frustration is entirely different from trying to destroy someone else's hope of getting help.)

  • Choices made by competent responders are always informed by the understanding that breaching someone's trust is traumatic and must be avoided if possible. Any kind of involuntary intervention is an extremely unlikely outcome when someone consults a clinician or calls a hotline. (Confidentiality is addressed in more detail in our Hotlines FAQ wiki). The goal is always to provide all help with the client's full knowledge and informed consent. We know that no individual or system is perfect. Mistakes that lead to bad experiences do sometimes happen to vulnerable people, and we have enormous sympathy for them. But anyone who suggests that this is the norm might be trying to scare people away from the help they need.

Please let us know discreetly if you see anyone exhibiting these or similar behaviours. We don't recommend trying to engage with them directly.


r/SuicideWatch Sep 10 '21

Please remember that NO ACTIVISM of any kind is ever allowed here. No matter what day it is.

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Activism, i.e. advocating or fundraising for social change or raising awareness of social issues (and suicide is, inescapably, a social issue) is absolutely against the rules here at all times.

Please understand that we're all for smart, strategic mental-health and suicide-prevention activism. It's essential to fight against stigma, misinformation, and discrimination, and to fight for research, treatment, accommodation, acceptance, and understanding. Most of us, one way or another, are mental-health activists IRL.

But activism just doesn't work in a dedicated support space that serves a vulnerable population. We used to allow it but the evidence that it was undermining our primary purpose became overwhelming. We do regret the need for this rule, but the need is inescapable.

Our population is all too well aware of the issues and causes that need support and largely not in a position to take action, so besides the fact that activism is often salt in our community's wounds, it's a waste of the activists' time.

tl;dr Any fundraising, awareness raising, petitions, calls for participation, or any post that's about any cause or issue (rather than a request for personal support) is not allowed here. Please report everything of the nature that you see.


r/SuicideWatch 11h ago

I can't believe I am here

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I spent 35 years working in mental health. I have worked crisis lines and talked people down from killing themselves. On my primary account I have come to this community to try and help people. Let me be clear I am not asking for help. I just need to tell someone my plans. I know if I share this with my doctors, family or friends they will all feel obligated to intervene.

This all started a little over 6 years ago when I quit a job I hated. I had significant resources to live on until I found another job. I had numerous health issues come up during this time that delayed finding another job. Last year I seriously started looking for work. I didn't expect it to be so hard. I have great references and a good work history.

I started getting really sick at the end of last year. I was in incredible pain. It took everything I had to just get up each day. I went to the doctor who ran labs and eventually referred me to an hematologist. It was cancer. It was a cancer with no cure. There is treatment that can extend my life. I wasn't so sure I wanted to go through it but with the encouragement of family and friends I did. I knew I could change my mind at any time.

The chemotherapy was very expensive. It was a quarter of a million dollars a month. Fortunately, I have really good insurance through the affordable care act. I could easily afford my deductible and copays. I had a procedure that required a lengthy hospital stay. I did this all by myself. I have no spouse or children. I applied for disability because I am in the last year of my savings.

I didn't know that one has to work at least 5 of the last 10 years to be eligible for social security disability. I was turned down. I physically can not return to work. I am in constant pain because the cancer caused my bones to weaken and break. Chemotherapy causes my thoughts to be foggy. After January I won't have money for bills including my health insurance.

I haven't given up yet. I am meeting with a disability attorney. I don't believe there is anything he can do but I will see. I am continuing treatment for now. I might just stop treatment before the end of the year or I may take my own life. I am on lots of medication and I know what will take me out quickly. Even if I could somehow afford my expenses there is a 50 percent chance I will be dead in the next 5 years.

I will certainly be dead without treatment. I will NOT become a burden to my family or friends just to have food and a place to lay my head. My life has been very good. I have loved and lost. I have great people who love me. I worked a job that allowed me to give back to society. I also have faith in God. Death is just another chapter. While I feel a little sad about this I am not overwhelmed with grief. Short of a miracle I see no choice.

Thank you for reading my post. I am not asking for anyone to tell me I shouldn't do it. I am not asking for help. I just needed to express myself.


r/SuicideWatch 17h ago

I know it's dumb, but I'm scared to death

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Hi....so....

I'm from Germany.

Just yesterday, for the first time since 1945, a fascist party has gained real power within Germany.

Reading through their manifest is horrifying and to be honest, I'm afraid they stand a real chance winning the next federal election.

And I'm scared.

I'm scared because we've been here before.

I'm scared because I know what happened in 1933.

I know the propaganda (it's repeating) and I know how that developed.

Of course they aren't openly saying they want to murder people.

The Nazis didn't either in 1933.

They only did that once they had broken so many taboos it didn't register as bad anymore to most people.

A lot of my friends are LGBTQ, handicapped or live alternative lifestyles.

And I'm terrified of watching their (and my) lives get turned into a living hell because of some fucked up fascist mob.

I know it's wrong, but honestly, I don't know what other solution there is than either violent resistance or fleeing the country.

I'm too old for either. Too old and too broken.

And I don't know what to do.


r/SuicideWatch 6h ago

Talking about suicide shouldn't be this delicate, taboo topic like its treated

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We should be able to casually talk about it like any other topic, the fact its so tiptoed and taboo seriously affects people wanting and being willing to talk about it. harshly enough same with people who make jokes about their past attempts, people cope in many different ways and they should be allowed to without people shutting it down because its a "taboo topic"


r/SuicideWatch 9h ago

“Suicide prevention month” my ass

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First we have suicide hotlines (that actually just bully you), copy and paste excuses that actually mean nothing except “If you die it wouldnt actually affect shit but since I wanna seem good I’ll just dismiss it in a nice way”, and now an entire month worth of just promoting this shit except it’s apparently even more important because since that’s the month’s theme everyone should all of a sudden care!! except they don’t.

literally one time I got insulted for venting about suicide because this month “isn’t something to joke about”. so apparently disrespecting the month September is way worse than committing suicide. good to know 😀


r/SuicideWatch 9h ago

Contradicting thoughts

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Does anyone else often switch between being excited for the future and being completely hopeless? Its a dumb question but i just switch between these two moods so fast i wonder if anyone has similar experiences to share


r/SuicideWatch 3h ago

how do i not be scared to pull the trigger?

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I got a gun a few days ago and ive tried multiple times to put it to my head and kill myself. I don’t really want to explain why ive gotten to this point or anything but im at a point where nothing is fixable. and i’m not capable or strong enough to get better. i just don’t know why i cant do it. i need someway to get it over with and idk how. also for the most instant death do u put it at ur temple or through ur mouth? im not sure exactly which way to do it.


r/SuicideWatch 4h ago

The job market did this

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I got the relevant degrees. I got the good gpa. I got the internships. I applied to more than a 1500+ applications for a f*cken ENTRY-LEVEL job over the course of YEARS. I did what the system said to achieve and still nothing.

I guess some people just slip between the cracks and get forgotten. I get ridiculed for not working hard enough by others, but they do not understand the job market isn’t what it used to be.

I guess I wasn’t lucky enough like others my age to at least get something in the corporate world. I’m tired of this world.


r/SuicideWatch 3h ago

how can i unfuck my life?

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i don’t know what to do. im f18. i’m a full time worker and full time student. i’m already behind on classwork. i can’t afford the 150 dollar subscription to be able to complete my homework. i have school in two hours. my boyfriend who is been dating for 1 year and 4 months doesn’t wanna live with me anymore. he’s getting an on campus dorm. no matter how much crying, breaking up and everything else i’ve tried he’s still leaving. i have to pay the rent by myself. live in our apartment by myself. do everything by myself. both my parents are dead. i have nobody else to rely on. my parents money is being withheld from me. my fridge is empty. i’m ugly. the only thing keeping me here is this old dog i’ve had since before mu parents died. his names nibby. i love my dog. i don’t want him to have to live without me. any advice on how to unfuck my life? atleast for long enough to keep myself afloat until he dies. he’s all i really have to live for. i don’t know what to do anymore


r/SuicideWatch 6h ago

I'm truly afraid I'm going to hurt myself NSFW

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Hey

Just made a post some hours ago

I took a shower, talked with someone and I felt better for a while. But it's almost bed time and I'm so afraid I'm going to try something.

I hate being poor. I fucking, fucking hate it. I'm unemployed, I was fired two months ago, three days before my birthday.

How does money go so easily? I had a car accident some weeks ago and boom, there goes a huge part of my savings. I need money and I don't wanna go to a call center again. The idea makes me nauseous. But what am I gonna do? I don't know anything better. I'm a loser, I'm so stupid.

I don't think I'll ever finish college. I don't have the option to go back and dedicate my time just to college. Why are jobs so time consuming? I had to wake up at 4:30 am, get out of my house at 5:15 and I usually came back at 5:00 pm.

Maybe I'm too weak. Maybe I shouldn't be alive. Why am I complaining of something that 90% of the population go through, and maybe most of them have even corse conditions.

I really feel so sensitive and weak. I don't deserve to be alive. I can't live like this. God, I don't even have real problems and I wanna kill myself. What am I gonna do the day I have real problems?

I don't want to go to a mental facility. I don't have money for it. Money is everything and I'm so sick of it. I need an eye surgery that I can't pay. Imagine the amount of money I'll be saving if I just end up with my life.

But deep down I know I don't wanna die. I just wish things were easier, I just wish I was stronger. I don't believe in God. I ask the universe for hope, that's all I want.

I think I'll be okay if I survive tonight


r/SuicideWatch 8h ago

15M I'm fucked.

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I have no more cards left to play. My future is fucked because I'm scared of becoming an adult and getting adult responsibilities, like getting a job, choosing a career, learning to drive, etc. and have good reason to as I lack, and I cannot stress this enough most practical skills.

I am extremely antisocial, all my life I've struggled at every phase of every relationship, I had a girlfriend that I didn't even like purely for the social benefits of being in a relationship, I barely have friends because I refuse to reach out to anyone.

I cannot be in school because of a bone marrow transplant so I am isolated and relegated to doing nothing all day and posting on social media as my only form of social interaction.

I barely have hobbies, smoking weed and political/military science seem to be the only things I like, and the only one I'm actually good at isn't the one that gets you jobs at the Pentagon.

The only thing I can take pride in now is knowing my suicide will be the response to 15 years of mind-bending hardship not just in my medical history but in my social endeavors and substance use instead of "my friends stopped texting me"


r/SuicideWatch 5h ago

Life is a piece of shit

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Life is a bitch, nothing will ever feel the same again. I'm already dead inside, and it's stupid not to accept that.


r/SuicideWatch 4h ago

Hey and goodbye everyone NSFW

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If I had a gun no doubt I would’ve been gone long time ago but things like that don’t happen often for the ones who truly want to die. What can I say except fuck this life, fuck it sideways..fuck it all ways imaginable one can possibly think to do. If I wake up on the other side to find out it’s all a test..yes I would be laughing because what do you meann we had to pay to live?? A thought came into my mind the other day that maybe the ones who know suffer and pain will progress onto the next life..and the ones who are bad and spoiled will reincarnate back here..it makes sense but still it’s whatever, I just want to die. And my lucid dreams man how every time when I get those I wish I didn’t have to wake up..and every time that I did killed me even more..how something like that can even exist in this reality. Woahh man I’m about to do this..can you feeel meee..it’s nostalgic that’s the only feeling I can describe..eventually it’s inevitable.
I’ll be in my car, it involves me and something sharp..I have stuff to numb me..I imagine I’ll listen to music.. while I lose consciousness and drift away. It’s either this or off a bridge that’s 33 stories or more.

I’m not gonna back out cause this is what I need to do and what I want..what’s the point of free will..if I can’t push past that fear. Here’s my advice take it however you like..you can feel this way and get distracted again that’s normal…only thing that Im doing different this time is not let the distractions distract me from this..cause I don’t plan on doing this again..I’ve accepted what it is…What a tragedy this is…..so it’s just me man alone again like before just like all of you..learn to live or die by yourself..that’s your only true value..in this world. I wish for many things but..I don’t know how to wish anymore....it’s been a long journey and it’s been a pleasure...and the ones wondering how they do it..it’s in the moment..you feel it and then… I hope there’s something on the other side..but if not..well we’ll see…I hope we all get what we wish for…in the end.


r/SuicideWatch 2h ago

I feel too mentally ill to live

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Agoraphobic ocd autism cptsd chronic pain I feel too mentally ill to live I have therapy and meds it’s not helping me I’m too disabled and ill


r/SuicideWatch 5h ago

Feeling fake

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Hi I'm a 35-year-old father of a 10-month-old and husband to a wonderful wife. I don't feel that I have deserved either of them. Probably not the usual post that people would put here, in fact, I hesitated to even post in the first place because what's the point when I know that I'm a bad person? I've cheated on my wife multiple times and put my job on the line to satisfy sexual urges. I'm in therapy and have been for the past 3 years with a therapist who specializes in sex addiction. While on the surface I can argue I've made some progress, the inner part of me just feels evil and uncontrollable. No woman deserves a partner like this, and how can I still look at my daughter as she grows up? I'm such a coward and even as I write this I feel like such a coward because ending it all would be the easiest way out. I don't feel safe in my own body in general right now. I truly feel like a pitiful excuse for a human being and I'm just a mask of myself. I found myself googling the medications that I take and how much would be dangerous. I carry a knife with me at all times and cut my thighs when I feel a sexual urge.

Anyway, would love to have some reassurance that I'm a coward and piece of shit. My only reason right now for staying around is my daughter that I love so much and I'm leaning into that, but also I feel I'm doing her a disservice by being her father figure when she becomes cognizant.


r/SuicideWatch 23m ago

Please just...

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I am living in extremely difficult and unstable circumstances. My mother, my brother, and I are living alone in another country, far away from our home country and without the support of our extended family. My residence permit is valid until November 2027, but my future after that is completely uncertain. My home country is not safe, and returning there would mean losing the security and future that I have worked so hard to build.

At the same time, even completing my high school diploma is taking a long time, and I cannot simply abandon my education and move to another country. My residence and educational circumstances do not allow me to change countries whenever I want and start over. In reality, I am in a situation where I cannot safely return to my home country, but I also do not realistically have the opportunity to move to another country and start a new life there.

The country where I currently live, as well as many of the surrounding countries, do not offer a realistic possibility for me to seek asylum and create a safe and secure future for myself. Because of this, I feel trapped in a dead end: staying is difficult, returning is unsafe, and moving to another country is not a realistic or accessible option.

The future and stability of our entire family depend to a great extent on my mother being able to successfully pass her language examination. For us, this is not simply an exam. Its outcome could affect our ability to remain here, our security, and the future of our entire family.

Despite all the effort I make, I still cannot have the same opportunities and privileges that a European person has from the beginning. No matter how hard I try, I always feel that I am not seen or treated like a European, and my future remains dependent on immigration laws and decisions that are beyond my control.

This situation is extremely exhausting and emotionally draining. I have to spend years studying just to complete my high school diploma, and afterwards I have to continue studying and working in order to meet the requirements for extending my residence permit. I feel that instead of being able to focus on building my future, choosing my education, finding a career, or having a personal life, my entire existence revolves around one question: whether I will be allowed to stay here or not.

The fear of being deported is always with me. If I am ever forced to return, I do not see a future for myself in my home country, and I do not know what would happen to me. At the same time, I cannot simply move to another country, because neither my educational and residence circumstances allow me to do so, nor are the surrounding countries realistic and safe options for me.

This situation is genuinely very difficult and overwhelming. This uncertainty has affected every part of my life. I struggle even with sleeping and eating. I feel as though I am in a situation where I am simply trying to get through one day at a time, without knowing whether, months or years from now, I will even be allowed to continue my life here.

All I want is to have a normal, safe, and stable life; to be able to finish my education, build a future for myself, and make plans for my life without constantly living in fear of deportation and losing everything.

Give me a painless method to kill myself...


r/SuicideWatch 17h ago

im tired of being ugly NSFW

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i just wanna die atp. there's no hope. i hate my body and my height. I hope I die in my sleep. thinking about my ugly body makes me wanna puke.


r/SuicideWatch 1h ago

I tried

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I finally started to cut myself. I wish I wasn’t such a screw up. I hate myself and everything about me. I have to go finish my biology homework now.


r/SuicideWatch 2h ago

My Past

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At the age of 9 years old, I was sexually assaulted and harassed. At the age of 10, was my first ever attempt of suicide. At the age of 11, was my second ever attempt of suicide. At the age of 12, I stopped eating, going to school, stayed in my home, not inside my own room but inside my locker. I was abused mentally physically and emotionally by my parents.

At the ripe age of 13, I had tried another two attempts to take my life. At the age of 14, the only path and friends I seen was apart of a gang I joined. I was jumped once, pulled a gun multiple times at people, fought multiple people.

At the age of 15, I tried to overdose. I did overdose but I was brought back to the life. The countless of attempts I had with my life is outrageous, I lost count if I’m honest.

At the age of 16, I was forced to move to Kenya by my parents, I made it seem like I wanted to go, no I didn’t. I hated it. Yes I went to a fancy and expensive school but it was the worst experience, not the people but the environment I was surrounded.

At the age of 16, I didn’t ever try to take my life ever again. I wasn’t depressed. I found my comfort, my own peace. I moved out at 16, well my parents weren’t living with me.

At the age of 17, I became a EMT while in High School, became a paramedic at 18 while in high school. I became a firefighter. I seen people die everyday, my own age mates, classmates, friends, randoms, people I seen, kids, babies, adults, grandparents, seen all of it, all the unique attempts of suicide, the beauty of life and the worst of life. I seen it at all.

I moved back to America, not to Minnesota but to Arizona, I lived alone. I raised myself since the age of 9. I didn’t have no one I depended on. I worked every job I could. I did everything I could.

My personal why to who I am today is my version of when I was young. I don’t please others or put a act, it’s irrelevant because I only please myself and my younger version. I didn’t have a childhood, I was just myself and I, alone, trapped in my dark thoughts.

This month is suicide awareness, I’ve been thinking about how I was raised growing up, I think about every attempt, I think about every dark night. Every attempt of running away. Being homeless. The countless interactions with the police.


r/SuicideWatch 1h ago

I wish i could die it right now

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I feel so suicidal. I wish i had a gun to kill myself. why does every other method require so much effort. why can't I just go to sleep and never wake up again, it's all I'm asking for, I just wanna die in my sleep , I don't wanna be in pain


r/SuicideWatch 36m ago

In the suicide "waiting room"?

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29M EU, with health issues that put me on daily meds since I was 10, with a job I sorta enjoy but outside that I don't know what to do with my Life.

No love aside the borderline fake One from my parents and a few Friends that I meet once in a Blue Moon since I moved away from my city.

I have my last grandpa that Is still alive at 97, but once he stops encomiably resisting I'll probably call It. I studied up to an MA and did jackshit with it for the longest time, my FOMO due to age raising and the lack of true love I feel is burying me and I can't hold my emotions as Easy as I was forced to in my childhood.

I began writing a list of people (parents, their respective new spouses, my sister, few friends, few colleagues) I'll write some sort of message once I go to the other side. And the fact I began doing that, waiting for the "casus belli" to happen, both worries me about the ones I might hurt and gives me relief for I might have some resemblance of decisional power.

Idk why I wrote all this rambling. I needed somewhere and Ssomeone to get It out of my chest and writing It on my notebook as I sometimes do had not become enough


r/SuicideWatch 11h ago

Im so scared of the horrid pain. NSFW

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Im so tired of the mental pain while being alive. But im terrified of feeling my legs break while im still breathing. I know it'll hurt. I know it'll feel worse than any pain I've ever felt in my life.. But im tired of the mental pain now. I dont know what to do. It'll hurt more than biting myself, it'll hurt more than cutting, itll hurt more than anything. Especially if it doesnt even work. I dont want to make it out alive then get sent to a mental ward. Im scared. Why doesnt anything ever work for me. Im so tired of being alive. I hate being me. I hate my life. I hate being here. I just wanna die a painless death.


r/SuicideWatch 2h ago

I feel suicidal every morning i wake up.

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I wake up and feel suicial because of this damn scar on my forehead. Why such shit happened to me i already had so much on my plate. I can't take this anymore. I genuinely think this was the worst that can happen to a girl. Nothing hurts like this nothing not even rape or death of someone.


r/SuicideWatch 1h ago

Simple question

Upvotes

So I'm on a point where I'm just sure that I'm going to do it, but I don't know how; the thing is I'm a f#cking p#$$y and I'm really scared of pain, so the typical wrists and hanging thing are off the table. I've been thinking that the easiest and most painless way would be to grab a lot of alcohol (I'm really weak for drinking, I get drunk with 2 beers) and get to a reaaaally high spot, once in there I just drink all the alcohol and let myself fall, I assume that due to all the alcohol the fall would not be really scary and hitting the ground will be totally painless, I just want to confirm before I do it and I would appreciate if somebody could clarify that for me, thanks!

Also, I'm not depressed; I'm just tired and I honestly don't see a reason to keep on, I'm not even sad... I just don't want to go through all the "work hard, pay bills, buy food, clean the house, go to the doctor , excercise" anymore, I think I want to just skip to whatever happens next, even if is nothing.