r/toastme • u/abdul_bino • 3d ago
29M I feel so undesirable right now. Between dating , potential jobs , just life in period.
I feel bad for constantly posting here every other month but I truly feel like my life is not what I expected. Still hoping for the best but hanging by a thread.
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u/haubenmeise 2d ago
My dear friend
Please keep the faith. Try and focus on the positive things in your life. I bet there are things to be grateful for or that give you joy. And please always remember to be kind to yourself. You are doing the best you can. Appreciate yourself. You deserve it.
Sincerely
Skeletor 💜
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u/In-the-Gentle-Rain 2d ago
Take it day by day, minute by minute and breath by breath if needed but don’t give up my friend.
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u/S1samnes 2d ago
I can tell even without you showing it you have a terrific smile. When you get out of this rough patch I’m sure dating success will come. You will get through this and on the other side you will be proud of yourself for making it through. Sometimes in life we have to just take pride in surviving — the strength it takes to keep going, keep fighting even when it’s so painful. You are so strong to survive what you’re surviving and you should be proud. I love you brother.
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u/whopeedonthefloor 2d ago
All things you need will come in time. Please remember that there are many around you feeling insignificant, like imposters, and like failures, you just can’t tell. It’s the human condition. Find things that make you feel good, even if it’s boring reading like me 😜, and fill your soul with that while you get the other pieces sorted. You’ll make it out of this feeling.
FWIW, I think I’m having a mid life crisis right, so we can stay strong together from afar 👏 it will get better
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u/Lanky-Anywhere-9994 2d ago
You're just hitting a rough patch Brother. It happens to us all. Take it from a 66 year old guy; things will pick up. But the longer you stay in your funk, the worse it gets and you'll be stuck longer than you want to be. Go over to the gym, get in a good workout. Or go on a long walk. My 2 boy's each experienced this the last few years right after they graduated college. The job market was tough, they felt like they were undesirable. I kept at them with my Wife to build them up. They stayed busy, working part time jobs and kept at it. They each found a job, not in their preferred field, but they were good jobs and now the eldest boy has a steady girl the past 2 years and the younger boy is dating around. You have to remember, as one of my dear friends always says, "Be Strong and Confident". People will see how you carry yourself and you will make it. Trust me, life is ups and downs, ebs and flows. You will do great! Good luck.
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u/xanadu-hiddenhand 2d ago
You are very good looking. Keep on it with the job hunt. Dating can wait. If you keep going towards change, taking any opportunity, however small, these things will add up. One day soon, you’ll be feeling better and women will sense it and they will certainly desire you.
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u/MajorSalad5445 2d ago
Most of us go along a path we didn't expect, think of it as an adventure! Become a lovable guy, get out a bit, and the gals will find you. God honors patience, and humility. Put HIM first, and all else will fall into place. Yes, easier said than done, but the only way...
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u/BadKauff 2d ago
I'm sorry to hear things are tough at the moment. Is there anyone you can talk with regularly? You deserve the help you need. Please prioritize your mental and physical health, my friend. Brighter days are ahead, I promise! Big hugs from me to you
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u/jayhawkjoey65 2d ago
There are 8 billion human beings and only one of you. You are supremely unique and special. Are you kind? If so, you're a success. ❤️
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u/Ok-Editor1747 2d ago
I’m 55 I went through it too at the end of my 20s. You got this. Just keep on going and Praying
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u/HuggingBear6102 2d ago
Niet bij de pakken blijven zitten, kameraad! Je leven in handen nemen, en erin blijven geloven: je kan het! 🍀
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u/SomeoneAlive123 2d ago
I'm so sorry life is being hard right now, but please stay strong. Things can't stay that way forever - they will improve. Soon!
You look very nice and kind and I hope you appreciate yourself for the way you are. Stay strong, buddy. Sending a big hug.
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u/Fluffy_Ad_5199 2d ago
Get up and move and help someone while you are in the waiting. Serving others always brings joy in our hearts that’s just how it works. Next thing you know you will be back in momentum again. ☀️ 🌺 🌳 🦅
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u/DependentParsley7107 2d ago
Your generation will see the Earth restored so hang in there brother. You have a beautiful future ahead of you. 1000 years of peace and abundance. Live centuries not decades. Perfect health in harmony with nature. The Golden Age is the good part.
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u/supamundane808 2d ago
I really wish the sub would have people say more about themselves cuz I feel like we shouldn't just be judging people based on how they look alone but I hope things get better for you soon.
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u/Fun-Leadership-3887 2d ago
Life is a journey and on the road of life we all have hills and valleys ups and downs but sometimes we just need to get out of ourselves and look around at all the beautiful things in the amazing world and after all we are just shepherds of everything that the lord gave us and there is a time for every purpose
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u/abdul_bino 1d ago
Thank you everyone here. I have take it upon myself to up my therapy sessions and learn more about if I have milf depression.
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u/Heavy-Lynx-8114 1d ago
I get it man, im a 29 yo guy too, don't be too hard on yourself. It's easy to feel behind or feel like it's not going well, should've been better, we're wasting time but there's just so many around us to compare with. It seems like others are doing well and we're failing but everyone struggles, and tbh having your life together these days is really hard. I also struggle dating and finding a nice way to make money, I feel like i should've been on the other side of the world, this isn't how i imagined life, didn't go to plan but we're still in the game and still able to turn everything around, even when it doesn't feel like it. I don't know you but i feel like you're actually being a good person and people around you admire that about you, so be proud of what you ARE doing. Hold on, things'll be better✌️
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u/Public_Cat_1674 1d ago
You’re not alone, lots of us around your age in the same boat :/ it’s tough out here for most people.
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u/Odd_Statistician4884 1d ago
It gets better. Your way becomes more and more clear as you go on. Keep your head up. You look like an awesome person
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u/Dangerous-Window6398 1d ago
Hang in there friend. It will get better. I hope you seek some therapy and see all the good things in life
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u/ScorsEden 1d ago
We all go thru that at different times of our lives. You are not alone. We all here for you.
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u/MerryClodhopper 10h ago
Ach, I'm sorry. It can feel tough when everything is digital and feels so interconnected. But it's not true.
You are better than you think. You seem like a decent just trying to right by himself. That is still something important.
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u/Life-Dragonfruit-204 2d ago
I’m not sure of your age but you look young. 20s and 30s can be tough, trying to get traction, trying make plans and make them work, trying to get a foothold and build wealth. Searching for love. But if you keep trying, eventually things fall into place. Sometimes by design and direct action. Sometimes by sheer luck or grace. It does take patience and tolerance for frustration. So it’s important to fill your days with things you enjoy that you can control. Try not to ruminate or yearn. It absolutely gets better. When I was 25 or 30 I would never imagine that I would have the life I do now.
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u/Witty-Rip-7472 2d ago
Você é desejável aos olhos de Deus e isso basta! É a quem devemos nos importar … fique bem!
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u/Serious-Distance937 2d ago
Hang in there buddy, it’ll be alright soon