For my own sanity, I have to know if there is anyone here or anywhere that has successfully treated and stopped their morsicatio buccarum.
I have had this brfb since I was a child. I do it so much that I have TMJ in one of my jaw joints, and a mild underbite. The skin around my mouth is more wrinkled than it should be for my age because i always have my fingers messing with my mouth or lips/mouth moving in weird ways that wrinkle the skin. I get headaches a lot from muscular tension and wake up with a sore jaw a lot.
I find rough skin with my tongue, then jam my bottom front and top front teeth together and peel and chew the insides of my cheeks and lips constantly. When I am able to get a good "piece" of skin, the feeling of chewing it repeatedly it between those two bottom/top front teeth gives some type of relief I can't explain. It's literally an addiction I think. I go into these trances where i'm just doing it for hours and thinking about different stressors or honestly even JUST THINKING in loops at the same time.
it gets worse when i'm stressed or anxious, but its ALWAYS something i'm fighting. I hate that I do it and feel so ashamed. My lips are always rough and my inner cheeks are always peeling. It makes me feel insecure and gross. I worry it will begin to affect my relationship, because while he is sympathetic to my struggle, he finds the act itself gross and annoying, literally so do I. It makes me feel insecure to kiss him because I hate my lips.
I've started to get depressed over how much I struggle with my own brain like this, and I've tried so many things. On rare occasions, there are these small moments of peace in my mind and body, and I feel the relaxation of my jaw, and the lack of temptation to chew, I quickly notice this, and then I mourn because I know it is fleeting and within a minute or two, I will be thrust into a never ending cycle of temptation, morbid satisfaction, pain, and shame.
I just need some hope and advice on how to stop it and get rid of it for good. And encouragement because its exhausting to deal with. Have you been able to stop it?