My daughter wants to major in something like “music industry” or “entertainment business.”

My stance is pretty simple: she can major in whatever she wants. It’s her life.

But if she chooses something that doesn’t have a solid career path and decent earning potential, I’m not paying for it.

If she wants to do MIS, engineering, finance, accounting, nursing, etc., I’ll support her financially. But I’m not dropping tens of thousands of dollars on a degree that I think has a weak payoff.

I also told her I wouldn’t be proud of that decision, and I do feel bad about saying that.

But college is expensive as hell, and some of these degrees feel like a hustle. I want her to have a strong foundation first, make good money, and then pursue whatever passions she wants from a stable position.

She can still choose the music route. I just don’t think I have to fund it.

Am I wrong?

I currently set aside around $150 a month for fun money, which works out to roughly 4–5% of my take-home pay.

I don't really force myself to spend it every month though. Some months I'll use it for dinners, games, or going out. Other months I barely touch it and just let the money build up.

I'd actually been saving mine for a few months because I wanted to upgrade my gaming setup. Finally used part of it last month on a 55" Hisense U7 for around $700.

That's kind of why I prefer letting fun money roll over instead of treating it as "use it or lose it." Sometimes I'd rather skip a few smaller purchases and put that money toward one bigger thing I'll use all the time.

Curious how everyone else handles this. Do you spend your fun money monthly, let it accumulate, or set some kind of cap once the balance gets too high?

TL;DR - My parents made like 20k/year growing up but my dad inherited ~1.5-2m USD in gaps, leading to stretches of struggle in between.

This is just a cultural rather than financial question, but growing up in the US [26M] I believed my family was poor. My parents had modest jobs (pre-K teacher, part-time plant vendor), we qualified for free lunch, and from ages 10 to 14 money was genuinely tight as we shared one car and one computer, lived with a broken washing machine for a year, and my parents fought over finances constantly. On the flip side, we owned a home in the same neighborhood with professors, doctors, engineers, and accountants, who sent their children to the same schools as me.

This inevitably lead to some questions from multiple teachers across multiple grades as I was the only kid in the class whose family income qualified me for free lunch even though my teachers knew where we lived. Multiple colleagues at my parents' church would try to subtly ask how my parents owned a house there because my parents accidentally told me they bought the house in cash and I casually mentioned it as a kid because I thought that was a normal thing everyone could do. Regardless, at 13 I gave up on my dream college because I was sure we couldn't afford it out-of-state. Around then I also discovered my parents were in over $150,000 of credit card debt.

My dad sat me down after I confronted him about never being able to afford my dream school and how I didn't see the point in trying so hard in school for it. He was apparently born to an affluent family but had a huge falling out with his siblings, and he told me about my grandfather, who died a year before I was born. He left a trust for 22 of his children to be paid out at his death and again 15 years later, with my dad being one of them. At his death in 1999, my dad had inherited $600,000 and used it to buy our house in cash and raise me. He expected another payout of over $1,000,000 before my 15th birthday, and promised that if I proved myself as a student, I'd never carry student debt. I remember calling him a delusional liar and resenting him for what I assumed was a story to calm me down. I ignored him and moved on, but a week later he put me in touch with the aunts and uncles I'd never met, who confirmed it. The money actually hit his account a little over a year later.

As an adult I describe my upbringing as modest or middle class at best. But my wife and others say that framing is extremely misleading, even offensive, to people who took me at my word about growing up without much or coming from a "modest family." Is it genuinely offensive to call my family and upbringing middle class? I justify it because it's treating an upper-middle-class inheritance as canceling out a working-class income, thus creating the middle class experience.

34 yr old. Is it worth the hassle of getting a 2nd job as part time, solely to put towards retirement? To try to max out my roth IRA. I already put very little into in each month. But, honestly its not enough.

I wanted to share some reflections on the financial aspects of owning a home as new buyers who purchased 5 years ago.

Purchase Details/Background:

• Closed as DINKs and first time buyers at 29yo in September 2021 a week before our wedding.
• 1967 SFH 1800 sq ft (+600 unfinished sq ft basement) 4 bed 2 bath 0.5 acre lot in suburb
• $345,000 paid, listed 330k, appraised 350k
• Joint adjusted gross income was 152k in 2021, most recently 156k in 2025.
• ~9% down, we told the broker we have 35 grand for all out of pocket costs, allot what you can for a down payment.
• 2.875% APR
• PITI payment has varied from $1666-$2003
• PMI removed at 2 years with a brokers price opinion

We went from city to suburb while searching due to costs. The suburb we picked has a poorer reputation as far as school district and affluence/amenities but it has not mattered to us (no kids so far though) and our immediate neighborhood is safe and diverse and solidly middle class. We have one of the smallest SFHs on the block and our street includes a cul de sac and home daycare in one direction and a park, townhomes, and apartment buildings the other.

The median household income for the zip codes in our city are $125k, $110k, and $90k. Our county as a whole is $107k. We are in a top 10 total tax burden (property, sales, income) state. Our net income is $9400 a month except for when I’ve been on disability (which was 9 months the past 5 years).

When we purchased, I had about $60k in student loans and I owed about $8k on my vehicle. My husband, bless him, had lived at home after college for 5 years to pay off his loans and save a nest egg. We had a small and fairly modest wedding which his parents helped with so we could focus his nest egg at buying. We have managed to pay down the debt to currently owing $16k with a plan to pay it all off by September next year, plus we have been rebuilding the nest egg/emergency fund and doing some traveling. If I hadn't had so much lost income to disability it would have been paid off by now, but life happens.

We are planning on a baby in the next 2-3 years so debt payments will just go to daycare if that happens as planned.

Lessons, takeaways, and advice for middle class house hunters:

I would never ever buy more house than I could 100% comfortably afford. Everything is real expensive and getting more so. Our monthly and utilities have gone up, our income stagnated for medical reasons, yet we were still able to afford the maintenance our home needed and pay down the debts. I am so glad we bought well within our means! I would never recommend planning to be any degree of house poor or counting on increases in income to afford today’s home. 

I would never ever buy in a neighborhood with questionable safety. The lack of smashed car windows, porch pirates, and sirens is priceless. 

Projects will take 2-3 times as long as you think, and be ready to add 30% to the budget.

I do not mind the move to the suburbs, even as we are still DINKs. I thought I wouldn’t like it! I am glad we picked an older neighborhood with big trees that does not feel cookie cutter/mcmansion and my neighbors are from all walks of life. 

Accessibility would be a way bigger consideration in any future house buying. Thankfully our home isn’t the least accessible (foyer split entries are common here) but being a tri level split means a half flight from main level to any toilet. We were young and healthy when we purchased but I’ve had 3 surgeries since then and my mom moved in for a few months when she was profoundly disabled from terminal cancer. The half flight is not too steep so with some extra long oxygen tubing and a walker on each level Mom did all right and I managed with my  crutches each time. Plus we happen to have a step in shower with grab bars and taller toilets. But! I think for any future home I would really insist that the main level have a toilet and sleeping situation available on the walk in level and I would counsel others to think about what aging looks like when they are buying. 

I learned to barter friends and family for help. Do you know how much quicker it is for 5 people to stain a deck? My father in law helped us for two weeks straight with painting and we got him lunch every day. I like to buy labor with coffees or food and it helps a lot. 

Ask for cash discounts when you get quotes. I’ve found a lot of small businesses are willing to lower the price for a cash job. 

I will usually pick, and recommend, practical over fashionable. Popcorn ceiling absorbs sound and hides imperfections. Carpet is softer on old joints and also absorbs sound. The top load Speed Queen washer was dated in look the second it came into the house but it will outlast anything else we could have picked. You do not need the nicest, shiniest stuff if you have a budget to stick to.

If I had to compromise due to budget, which we did, I would again go with outdated but lovingly maintained. We looked at a couple flips and I’m so glad we didn’t go that route. The couple we purchased from were empty nesters downsizing and had been in the home 20+ years. They did kind things like leave many items for us, notes with tips (ie we didn’t do a garbage disposal because the pipes do xyz, monthly we used a biocleaner in the drains, tricks to using the rider mower they left us), and had made practical and nice updates over the years - such as a water softener and whole home humidifier. We inherited a binder of receipts and manuals which was actually super helpful. Now we get to continue to update cosmetically as we want to and budget allows. 

Money, Money, Money:

• Utilities have gone up across the board (gas, water, electric, trash/recycling) despite consistent use and shopping around where we can.
• Insurance has gone up despite shopping around. We had 1 claim with no work/just an inspection due to ice dams in 2023. 
• Taxes have gone up annually with minor adjustments in assessment value. My county assesses each year, house is homesteaded. It's already being talked about that next year's taxes are going to go way up again due to shortages at the county level.
• By buying in a spot comfortable for us, we were able to absorb increases, pay down debts, and do what the house needed.

Maintenance and Updates and Costs:

We have done a lot of projects around the house. Some were necessary and some were for looks. It has always amounted to either a lot of work, a lot of money, or both!

Professional:

• 600 sq ft of carpet, 600 sq ft of LVP, 500 sq ft of hardwood refinished ~$18k
• Trees - removal of 6 dead tress, planting 1, disease treatment about 8 times, some trimming ~$15k
• Pest removal wasp nests and subscriptions ~$1200
• Re-key (covered by seller's warranty)
• Window/Slider door coverings x 4 ~$6k
• Driveway sealed x 2 ~$700
• Attic seal and insulation ~$1800
• Garage door servicing/maintenance x 2 ~$500
• Chimney flashing (warranty paid for about $7k of work)
• Roof Soffits ~$4k
• Siding repair due to woodpeckers ~$1500
• Furnace Flu piping due to crack ~$900
• Replacement of emergency water shut off pipe and valve ~$900
• Furnace, A/C, water heater, and gas fireplace serviced 2-3 times each ~$1800
• Vent cleaning ~$250
• Storm door addition ~$1k
• Glass short door addition ~$1100
• Vanity and wall tile glazing ~$1100
• Deck sanding/stain x1 ~$1500
• Multiple appliances replaced via home warranty plus out of pocket funds to upgrade through local appliance place for install and service - dishwasher, refrigerator, trash compactor, clothes washer ~$2200 out of pocket
• Rough out of pocket total ~ $55,850

DIY:

• Outdoor maintenance tools have cost about ~$5k
• Ground wasps, bee wasps, wasps living in patio furniture (before hiring professionals) ~this was primarily a psychological cost
• Window coverings x 6 ~$250
• Light fixtures x6 ~$300
• Outlets and switches x 20 + ~$120
• Vent covers x 12+ ~$100
• Concrete repair ~$30
• Screen replacements ~$30
• Door handle and keypad deadbolt ~$200
• Outdoor water spigots x2 ~$20
• Deck stained x1 ~$100
• Sink faucet replacement x2 ~$100
• Shower head replacement ~$80
• Drain snaking x4, ~$20
• Thermostat upgrade to smart device ~$80
• Keypad garage opener ~$50
• Doorbell camera, flood lights with cameras, ~$500
• Tons of painting/priming - indoor ceilings and every room, outdoor siding and trim, this was ~$2k in supplies
• Lots of nail pop fixes, ~$100
• Rough out of pocket $9080 and a lot of gray hairs

TLDR: Overall, owning the home has been a learning experience, expensive, stressful, a labor of love, and a source of pride and joy for us. My advice to house hunters would be to plan for costs, then plan for more costs or lost income, and make practical decisions. We do not plan on leaving any time soon and if we did we would not be making back what we've put into the home!

For fun, here are just a couple project/update photos.

Four months ago, I posted that I was chipping away at my mortgage. I'm married but was the one who borrowed the $94k four years ago.

https://www.reddit.com/r/MiddleClassFinance/s/CgqNlpKTXA

I had many comments, those in favor (peace of mind) and many more who advised against it (credit score lowered, can earn more than 5% investing, etc.) but went ahead and did it.

"Bought" our regular old suburban split-level on 9/1/01 ten days before 9/11, had five-year ARMs for about twenty-one years, finally locked in a 10-year mortgage in July 2022 and paid off a total of about $80,000 the first half of this year including three $20k+ months in a row.

Anyway, I wanted to share it somewhere so might as well be here.

BTW, I don't feel great in general. Just not paying a mortgage for a while.

Also, have to pay Crook County property taxes this month, $4k for our house and another $6k for my mom's (in Evanston), so I'm feeling way stretched financially as always.

If you live at home with your parents to save money, what percentage of your paycheck should you be saving and investing?

I want to build my savings aggressively, but I also don't want to invest 100% of my paycheck.

I paid taxes on the materials and the labor. So why the f do my taxes go up?

Earlier this week I asked what interest rate would actually get you to sell your home. This came from honest curiosity, after reading that the housing market was frozen. Hundreds commented with a mortgage rate that is well below today's rates.

So here is part 2. If you bought a home in the last couple of years, or are buying now, how did you make it work?

Did you sell and roll a lot of equity into the new home? Pay the fees and new mortgage and budget ahead? Did your income go up and it just made sense?

If you were a first time buyer, same question. How did you make it work? I am sure a lot of others would be interested in how you pulled it off.

And I know there is a third group who didn't really have a choice, and life happened and put them in the position of buying in this market. How are you doing? And how are you managing?

Still trying to wrap my head around all of this, thx for reading and sharing.

Like back 10 years ago when I made 60 K I felt like I just had more money to save now I make 120 K 10 years later same job just feels like everyone else is doing better than me. I’m just left behind.

Just read this and broke out in a cold sweat.

I work from home and could do it from anywhere, but we'd prefer to stay in the continental U.S. - somewhere with either mild winters or mild summers.  

Wife is SAHM.  My annual gross income is $240,000, but it would probably go down a little in a smaller market, probably not lower than $200k. 

3 kids, but multigenerational household (mom age 75 lives with us now that my dad has passed away). So we really need 4 bedrooms, preferably 5. 

Owe about $800k on the mortgage.  No other debts.  Comps selling in our neighborhood for about $1.2 million. Feeling squeezed out and don't see ourselves here long term. 

Can't afford to buy a 5 bed anywhere in Orange County anymore.  Suggestions on where to look outside of California?

Other factors: prior military, so I'd consider veterans benefits at the state level (college tuition discounts for kids, property tax breaks, etc) to be a favorable factor.

So it’s nice when extra money falls into your lap.

FAFSA $8000 for education
Lawsuit (not mine) of an apartment complex awarded me $500
Ex paid me $500 she owes me
Fiancé gave me $100 for fixing her car (technically not more money since we’re together and I just paid $50 for her to treat herself) so I got $50 extra
Insurance company refunded me $60
Found $20 in change from cars I drive at work. They aren’t owned, just recently bought from junk yards. Can’t believe people just leave money in their car.
Just canceled my chatGPT and glasshealth subscription that I forgot about. So that’s saving me $40/mo.
And I made $30 from just using my credit card because it’s cash back.

I may not make a lot of money but when I get ahold of it, I do everything I can to keep it. Adding it to the pile and then getting back to work.

What ways has money fallen into your lap recently?

im 25 and currently work as an outpatient endoscopy nurse making around $41/hr. i work 6-2 m-f and my job is pretty low stress. i enjoy what i do, its fulfilling because i help peopl, and i have great WLB (i get off between 12pm-2pm depending on caseload for the day).

me and my spouse are also able to save/invest around 70-80k a year combined so its not like we’re struggling financially.

but at the same time i know im probably underpaid compared to what i could be making. i see hospital jobs paying $50-55/hr (spouse currently makes ~50 /hr as a bedside pediatric nurse) and sometimes feel like im kinda wasting my potential by staying at a job thats so comfortable. ive also thought about going back to school or trying to move into something with more career growth.

but then i think about what id actually be giving up. id probably have worse hours, more stress, weekends, holidays, etc. and im not even sure id be happier.

i guess im just torn because part of me feels like i should be pushing myself more while im young and trying to reach my full potential, but another part of me thinks why would i give up a job i actually like and a good quality of life just to make more money?
anyone else been in this position? did you guys prioritize work life balance or chase the higher salary/career growth?

Today, in many cases, you almost need to be married and have two incomes just to afford a home. And by “afford,” I don’t mean paying cash. I mean doing what most people do—using conventional financing if you qualify, or FHA if you don’t.

So you and your wife buy the house and move in. Then what happens if you want to have children?
If your household is relying on two incomes to afford everything, and your wife wants to stay home and raise the children as a traditional wife—which I fully support—now you’re down to one income.

So what does the husband do? He would probably need to find a better-paying job, potentially one that pays six figures.

But what if he can’t get a six-figure job? What if he doesn’t yet have the resume, experience, or opportunities to earn that kind of income? What if he doesn’t have another way to make additional money on the side?

Then what?

Things have become so unaffordable that we are increasingly becoming a renter nation. Even people who have their lives together are renting instead of owning. Hopefully, they at least own stocks, ETFs, or some other appreciating asset so their money is still working for them.
But the days when someone earning $50,000 to $60,000 a year could comfortably buy a home on one income and still have enough room in the budget for everything else are largely gone.

If inflation continues and affordability continues to deteriorate, the question becomes very simple: what are people supposed to do?

We do pretty decently but the cost of home renos is (IMO) crazy.

We bought a house that had laminate floor that needs to be replaced. It was worn through to the actual slab and had pee smell thanks to the prior renters. While removing those, we found mold all over the shared kitchen and bathroom wall.

Since the necessary repairs changes so drastically it took us forever to get to a point where we’re finally tiling. I already demoed and prepped the slab to tile and figured I’d get quotes for tile install (I also bought all the materials and had them delivered) to save us some time. We got quotes for $10/ sq ft. I’m getting quotes for cabinet installs and the handyman is charging over $1000/day. He also wanted to charge me for an estimate and I had to decline that. Again, I have all the materials in the house ready to go.

Looks like we’re DIY-ing this whole thing but I’m curious what everyone else is doing/ seeing.

• New Bankrate analysis shows most U.S. homeowners are paying substantially more for their mortgages than needed, with average excess costs topping $3,300 a year.
• The burden is greatest in major coastal cities, including the Los Angeles, New York and Miami metro areas, where typical borrowers lose $5,800 to more than $8,000 annually in avoidable charges — which can add up to nearly $150,000 over a 30-year loan.
• Experts recommend shopping around for lenders and treating your mortgage "like a negotiation" to avoid overpaying.

41m, 130k annual income, no credit card debt, small medical bills at 0% interest and 28k owed on a new to me car at 4.6%. Owe 130k (over 24 years at a monthly payment of $715) on a condo worth 300k with a 3.5% interest, low HOA fees, that I actually like living in. Generally low expenses, rarely go out, not interested in gadgets, toys, fashion. Splurge on a few moderately priced vacations a year, quality produce, and any book that sparks my interest.

I contribute 7k yearly to a Roth IRA, put $100 a week into index funds. Currently have 650k in retirement accounts (mostly roth), around 50k in other investments, plus 12k emergency fund (working on growing with a goal 30k). I started a new job and am thinking about only putting 8% of my pay into a roth, plus the 4% employer match. Is this a huge mistake?

I know that you are supposed to max out 401k and boost the savings down the road, but how much of that is just dogma? I know that it makes financial sense and I tried to inch my way towards maxing out over the years. But after years of throwing so much into retirement accounts and feeling like I am overly indexed on money I can't really touch for years and would rather get some utility out of it now rather than when I retire. I'm not married, don't have kids, and want to build my Efund, pay off my car, and maybe live a few percentage points better (mindful as always of lifestyle creep). Odds are very good that my money will outlive me, and as much as I know this is a marshmallow test I would rather enjoy life a bit more than give my nieces and nephews a bigger inheritance.

I know that I am opening myself up to a lot of hate and derision (this is reddit after all), but I am trying to wrap my mind around the pros and cons and would welcome constructive input.

I already keep about 6 months of expenses in an emergency fund, but I don't really want to keep putting additional money into savings. Between taxes on the interest and inflation, I'd rather put that money into a brokerage account and let it grow.

For example, my truck is 3 years old, and I have no idea when I'll replace it. Ideally, I'd pay cash unless I could get financing under 3%.

My thought is to invest the money in my brokerage and, when I eventually need the vehicle, wait for a good market year to sell and pay cash rather than selling during a downturn.

Is this how anyone else handles future large purchases, or do you keep separate cash/sinking funds for them?

Moving into my first apartment soon. Got the obvious stuff covered like sheets, a broom, cleaning supplies, all that.

What I’m actually looking for is the unconventional stuff. The random thing you bought on a whim or almost skipped, and now it’s somehow non-negotiable.

Kind of like motion activated night lights for the stairs or bathroom. Small, cheap, not something you’d think to put on a checklist, but it genuinely changes how your place functions day to day.

What’s yours? What’s the thing nobody tells you to buy until you’re already living without it?

So I’m gonna ask opinions. 52yo with a 53 stay at home mom and a handicap son, we will likely have for life. I have $465k in a traditional IRA, she has $40k in a beneficiary IRA and $10k in a Roth.

We’re taking +\- $13k out of the beneficiary and sending 32% to fed and 10% to state (Oregon Sucks). Putting $7500/yr in a spousal IRA. Immediately converting to Roth. Gotta do something with the 10 yr rule 🤷🏻‍♂️

I’ve got about $700k in a 401k (22% Roth) and max out traditional plus add the catchup at Roth. Company gives 4%.

I also buy our company stock at a 10% discount for the second 6mo of the year as my 401 is maxed by then. (Totals $14,300). I usually just sell immediately and move to VOO. Got about $50k in value here in a regular brokerage. Got another $15k in traditional brokerage I just play with. $30k HSA.

Savings about 80k. Checking about $55k (I know it’s too much, but I like the comfort factor).

I certainly don’t count on it, but likely to inherit about $750k in next 10 years.

No debt, outside mortgage. 2 cars less than 2 years old, paid for. Mortgage is $180k at 3%. It goes till I’m 68 if I don’t pay extra.

Income +\- $340k wages. $50k Other (dividends, stock vesting, interest).

I want to walk at 59.5. Essentially puts me at 7 years.

Love thoughts on the following:

1. Should I be backdooring at this tax bracket?
   
2. How would you suggest I bridge from 59.5 to social security.
   
3. Should I go ahead and pay off mortgage? (Seems appropriate to lower cash needs in retirement and the need to take income). Also seems like I could lower income as I don’t need it to max Medicare subsidies.
   
4. Longevity is not high in my family, I question waiting to 70 for claiming ss. My dad passed at 77. Opinions?
   
5. Any other thoughts?
   

Just trying to get my head wrapped around it. I just worked my whole life, and winding down is a real change in mentality and financial philosophy.