First, didn't even know 7 Brew existed until today when their store caused over a mile-long traffic jam that I witnessed while on my own coffee run to a local coffee spot, which lead me down the rabbit hole of their "Jackpot days".

What I learned is that 7 Brew was bought out in 2020 by a LLC conglomerate and then by Blackstone in 2024 and that's when all the insanity of their chain exploding from 7 little stores in 2020 to around 602 today.

That's quite a jump in numbers for a company that started as a little ma and pa store.

So why care about this at all? Well their insane promotional days have made their consumers into free billboards for their company by giving away cheap cr*p that was made in China and will end up in the landfill after the consumer bores of the product.

Today's Needoh "giveaway" was the worst of this money-grab scheme that turns everyone posting online about it into an unpaid advertiser for the company.

The problem is the toy isn't "free" you have to purchase their overly sweet drinks in med or large to even get the toy. I did the math after discovering that was going in when I drove to a local place to get coffee this morning and saw the madness at 7 Brew.

So here's the math:

A more speciality Needoh toy can retail from $12-$19.

We can call the Needoh toys given away today at 7 Brew "limited" and only obtained through this promotion a "speciality" item and since they are "one-of-a-kind", we'll price it at $19.

In order to get ONE toy you have to purchase 2 med or large drinks that range from $3.50-$9.43.

Let's say the "average" family has 2 kids and both kids want a toy, you have to buy 4 drinks. You likely will get your kids a basic lemonade for $3.50 each and then you and your spouse want speciality coffees each $9.43.

So you spend $25.86 (not including tax) for that trip. In that context it seems like you have "won" because you get these speciality toys 2 for $25.86 rather than having to pay $38 for two (remember the $19 high-end Needohs at Target).

But the other "math" I'm most concerned about is this math:

Each of those "plain" lemonades is 49 grams of sugar each, equally 200 calories that you are pumping into your kids.

Let's say your kid doesn't want the "plain lemonade" and they want instead one of the speciality lemonades or say a milkshake, now you are looking at up to 151 grams of sugar and 620 calories. For. One. Drink.

What is even worse is that when you got to 7 Brew's IG and read the comments, most of the consumers are just adults with no kids.

There is something wrong with society. This kind of ish makes me embarrassed to be a human.

Just in case you/y’all don’t know, you can report ads for any reason. Just another way to not put up with the bullshit.