This post is part of a series of reviews. To see them all, click here.

Historical information found on Shannon Sullivan's Doctor Who website (relevant page here) and the TARDIS Wiki (relevant page here)). Primary/secondary source material can be found in the source sections of Sullivan's website, and rarely as inline citations on the TARDIS Wiki.

Story Information

• Episode: Series 7, Episode 10
• Airdate: 27th April 2013
• Doctor: 11th
• Companion: Clara
• Writer: Steve Thompson
• Director: Mat King
• Showrunner: Steven Moffat

Review

Smart bunch, Time Lords. No dress sense, dreadful hats, but smart. – The Doctor

Having now watched "Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS" for the fourth time, I can with full confidence say that I feel insulted. This episode is a colossal waste of time, budget, and of its one good idea. I say "its one good idea" as though it has a lot of ideas, most of them bad. Honestly though, this one has maybe two ideas total. The word that describes this episode, more than anything else, is boring. This episode, which is built around the creative team wanting to explore the TARDIS more, to get to know the ship that has been present in nearly every Doctor Who story ever…is boring. And insulting. And awful.

Well at least this should be a shorter review to write (compared to my normal stuff anyway) seeing as basically nothing actually happens in this thing. So…yay?

This episode came about because both showrunner Steven Moffat and eventual writer Steve Thompson remembered being disappointed by the chase through the TARDIS in the final episode in The Invasion of Time as children. Invasion of Time's low budget, especially in its final episode, prevented sets from being constructed for the sequence, meaning that we saw a version of the TARDIS that apparently consisted largely of ordinary rooms filmed in a disused hospital. And so Moffat challenged Thompson to do a better version of that concept.

I think Invasion of Time episode 6 does a far better job at realizing the idea of the TARDIS interior, the infinite living ship than anything in "Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS". Obviously, Invasion has its own issues. That final episode…is not good. But there is an imagination in those sequences that is just kind of lacking here, even though Invasion's scenes can feel a bit drawn out. The closest "Journey" comes in hitting at that level of imagination is a sequence where two "echo" versions of the console room, neither of which is the real one, but are linked in such a way that they effect each other. I'll also give credit to the bit the TARDIS console gets pulled apart and we start to hear lines from past episode ranging all the way back to the first episode of the show. Otherwise though, there's not much going on here, and the episode's actual plot is frustratingly straightforwards, given where it's set.

It really doesn't help that this particular version of the TARDIS interior doesn't really lend itself to interesting set design. I don't dislike this version of the console room, but the walls don't have all that much going on in them, just hexagonal patterns. In terms of corridor design this translates to a lot of generic corridors, which isn't exactly fresh and new on Doctor Who. What's frustrating is that this isn't even the first time in the 11th Doctor era that a chase through the TARDIS was used in an episode. And in said prior episode, "The Doctor's Wife", the set design for the TARDIS corridors felt a lot more distinct than they do here.

But okay, so the set design isn't great…and the chase sequence lacks imagination…maybe this can be saved with a good story? Well, no because reimagining the chase sequence was the whole point of doing this episode. The story was always going to be secondary to the exploration of the TARDIS. But even given that…this is rough.

Our secondary cast consists of the Van Baalen brothers, Gregor and Bram, and their android helper Tricky. They run a salvage company (and seem to be the only employees of said company), called Van Baalen Bros. And they are, all three of them, some of the dullest characters I've ever seen in a Doctor Who episode. While technically Gregor and Bram claim to have an "equal partnership", it's very obvious that Gregor is in charge, while Bram is mostly portrayed as dumb muscle. Gregor is pretty mean to Bram but that gives him the tiniest hint of a personality unlike Bram, who is just…nothing. He gets no character whatsoever, except being a bit annoyed that Gregor keeps ordering him around. Which…why does he put up with that in an "equal partnership"? I get that these sort of things do happen, that a stronger personality will often overwhelm others, but Gregor isn't subtle about it. He just orders Bram around.

Oh but then there's Tricky. Tricky the android shows significantly more empathy than the two humans throughout the episode. It's not hard to figure out that Tricky is actually a human, mostly because the episode continually shoves foreshadowing of it down our throats (he's awfully emotional for an android claiming to have no emotion). Tricky isn't an android, he's a human who thinks he's an android. As a twist it's fine, would work better if Tricky weren't as one-note as the other two. He's also a Van Baalen brother, who was made captain by the brothers' father. An accident took away his memory so as a joke his brothers decided to make him believe he was an android. I mean just…wow. Somehow the episode gives us an initially tragic ending for Gregor and Tricky (Bram just kind of dies randomly off-screen) by having them reconcile only to be killed. I feel nothing at the deaths of these characters because Gregor is despicable and both are boring as sin and by this point in the episode I'm desperately hoping for it to be either over or the sweet relief of death, whichever comes first.

The plot itself is kicked off because the Van Baalen Brothers use a magno-grab on the TARDIS while the Doctor put down the shields so that Clara could learn to fly the TARDIS. Considering last episode she negotiated with the TARDIS to take them where they needed to go, it kind of feels like we're doing things backwards but, whatever, Clara learning to fly the TARDIS makes a kind of sense, as a way to get the two of them to actually like each other. I'm not sure why you'd put down the shields so that she could fly the TARDIS but whatever gets this plot going I guess. The mango-grab somehow damages something in the TARDIS engines, and all hell breaks loose. The Doctor somehow ends up on the outside of the TARDIS under some rubble on the Van Baalen Bros' ship (how? no clue), and then recruits the Van Baalens to help find Clara, first with the promise of salvaging the TARDIS interior then with the fake threat of blowing up the TARDIS (he doesn't know it's actually in danger of blowing up at that point).

Okay so part of the problem with this plot is that from this point nothing really happens. We follow around the Doctor as he looks for Clara, the Van Baalens as they both look for Clara and try to tear apart the TARDIS for parts (it doesn't go well for them) and Clara as she tries to avoid the time zombie chasing her. We'll get to the time zombies momentarily but, that aside, it's just a lot of wandering around corridors. And I know that Doctor Who often gets stereotyped as a lot of wandering around corridors, but that's less the case in the Revival era because of increased budget for sets. And even by the standards of the Classic era, a shocking percentage of this episode is spent wandering around in corridors. So not only are the guest characters boring but what both they and the main characters are doing is boring.

You might assume that something called "time zombies" running around the ship might provide relief from the boredom. But honestly, I found these guys really dull too. They're future echoes of the main cast from after they die in the TARDIS. The Doctor really tries to avoid saying what they are, as it seems like the more the cast know what they are, the more real they become. Which all sounds really fascinating. But…it's just not. And the designs don't much help either. They're just not much to look at when you get right down to it. Still, this episode desperately needed some sense of threat, so I guess these guys will do. Honestly, in a better episode, these guys could have been perfectly acceptable as a generic threat, similar to how the Primords functioned in Inferno. Here they're just kind of boring in an episode that is aggressively boring and it's just one more idea that annoys me.

Now this episode does have Clara learn a surprising amount about the Doctor, including, incidentally, his true name. This won't actually matter mind you, but it does happen. Does Clara show any actual personality in this episode, after we got the first glimmers of a personality out of her last time? Not really, no. Jenna Coleman gets a couple moments where her immense talent and charisma as a performer do shine through, but that's kind of it.

Now as for the Doctor, this episode does have an underlying theme of the Doctor keeping secrets. He tries to hide the truth about the time zombies from the others, there's of course the big secret around the Doctor's name which comes up, and, of course the fact he's keeping the Impossible Girls stuff from Clara. As he says at one point "Secrets protect us! Secrets make us safe!" to which Clara naturally points out that they aren't particularly safe in that moment. What's interesting is that all of the secrets that the Doctor is keeping do eventually come out. Clara reads his name and the truth about the time zombies is discovered by Gregor thanks to some scanning equipment he has. And the Doctor does eventually tell Clara about the Impossible Girl stuff in a moment where he thinks that they're going to die.

That sounds like a good thematic center of an episode honestly. The secrets the Doctor is keeping come out, and each with their own devastating consequences (well except for his name). There's two problems with this. The first is the way the episode ends, which I'll get more into later. The second, though, is that none of these scenes are particularly good. Clara finding out the Doctor's name is really a nothing moment, though that has more to do with the fact that the question of the Doctor's name is actually not that interesting. The discovery of what the time zombies are just kind of falls into the sludge of the rest of the plot. The Doctor telling Clara about the Impossible Girl stuff does have some merit to it, mostly because the Doctor is suddenly trying to interrogate her. It's a moment that would work a lot better if we hadn't already established in "Hide" that Clara is completely unaware of whatever makes her special but, whatever, maybe the Doctor doesn't completely trust the word of a psychic he knows is pretty good at being a psychic for whatever reason. It's still the best reveal of the bunch, but the Doctor feels like he pushes the line with Clara a lot in that scene, considering he at least has good reason the think Clara might not be aware of her Impossible Girl-ness.

Oh but don't worry, none of these reveals matter anyway. Because the near-exploding TARDIS plot is resolved thanks to a literal reset button. It's even labeled "Big Friendly Button". And this is where, frankly, I feel insulted by this episode for wasting my time.

You'd think that, given how bored I was by the episode to this point, I wouldn't mind so much. After all, since I wasn't invested in the ongoing plot, why should I care when it turns out none of it mattered anyway? To the contrary, the fact that in order to get to the end of this episode I sat through forty or so minutes of the most painfully dull material I've ever watched on television and then it didn't even happen somehow makes it worse. Like I was already feeling like the entire episode was a waste of time but things were sort of starting to happen so isn't it nice that none of it matters?

Oh and a quick word on the music. Like with a lot of episodes from around this era I do like the main theme composed for this episode, "A Machine That Makes Machines". It's essentially two pieces of music, the first very industrial as befits an episode set in the TARDIS. The second half is a more mysterious piece of music, which suits what this episode is trying to go for, even if it never succeeds – though this second half is a lot more generic. The problem is, as is increasingly becoming a problem, the use of awkwardly stitched together reused tracks that just end up feeling jarring. It's a criticism I've had of a lot of episodes in the back half of the 11th Doctor era, and, yup, this one has that issue.

I hate this episode so much. At least the events of The Twin Dilemma actually mattered, and the character stuff from that story, as awful as it was, could be seen to carry forwards in later 6th Doctor stories. And had some reasonably memorable characters. This thing is just worthless. Technically there will be a reference to the events of this episode in the finale, but if you remove that reference from the finale, literally nothing changes. This episode does nothing, it has boring characters, the leads aren't all that much better, particularly as Clara continues to struggle to develop an actual personality. And it's just dull. And none of it matters. And it's boring.

Score: 0/10

Stray Observations

• Steve Thompson had originally intended to propose a story about the early years of Taren Capel, the main villain of The Robots of Death. Is this a bit fanwanky, considering that that was a 36 year old story? Perhaps, but I imagine it would have been better than this.
• Thompson was excited by the prospect of this episode. His degree is in pure mathematics, so was naturally interested in writing about multi-dimensional geometry.
• Originally Tricky would have been named Sander. The subplot about his brothers tricking him into thinking he was an android was a later addition.
• Gregor, meanwhile, would have been disfigured with metallic attachments.
• The title was Steven Moffat's idea. The obvious inspiration was the Jules Verne novel, Journey to the Centre of the Earth.
• Jenna Coleman fell ill during filming. As a result, a few planned scenes to be filmed in the console room were set aside for more effects and pick up shots.
• The Doctor claims the TARDIS interior is infinite.
• The Doctor uses a switch to close the TARDIS doors. Of course in the Classic series this was the standard way of opening the doors, since the police box doors weren't actually part of the TARDIS interior. However since the Revival started showing the police box doors in the interior we've not seen a use of the door switch.
• The Doctor's cot makes an appearance. It was first seen in "A Good Man Goes to War". In the same room is the toy model TARDIS that Amy made, first seen in "The Eleventh Hour" and last seen in "The Wedding of River Song".
• Actually of note though is Clara seemingly taking particular interest in an umbrella, which I think is the same one that her Victorian counterpart used to grab the ladder to the TARDIS cloud in "The Snowmen".
• The Doctor explains that the Eye of Harmony is an "exploding star in the process of becoming a black hole". I don't think we've ever actually explained what the Eye of Harmony is. Neat.
• The idea of the TARDIS engines being frozen mid-explosion was the suggestion of Steven Moffat's. He was inspired by Rebecca' Horn's mechanized sculpture, Concert for Anarchy. Concert consists of an upside-down piano suspended in mid-air that periodically has the keyboard and its innards explode outwards before retracting back.

Next Time: The Paternoster gang take over for about half an episode, which is just as well because after this one I wouldn't mind spending some time pretending I'm watching something else

Season 17, Episode 3

The Creature from the Pit(4 parts)

-Written by David Fisher

-Directed by Christopher Barry

-Air Dates: October 27th-November 17th, 1979

-Runtime: 97 minutes

Or as I like to call it...

The one with the phallic blob monster

We Begin!!! On Chloris, where Lady Adrasta is having her guards throw a man into the titular pit as punishment. Elsewhere the TARDIS is flying about as Romana is rummaging through The Doctor's variety of things in which she finds an MK3 Emergency transceiver which The Doctor had removed to stop getting missions from the Time Lords. She decides to reattach the device to the TARDIS console at which point the TARDIS immediately picks up a distress call from the planet Chloris. They decide to head over and investigate, not finding anyone when they land, just the pieces of a giant egg, with The Doctor quickly realizing the transmission is coming from the egg. While he's investigating further he's set upon by Wolfweeds who attack him until the Adrata's men arrive who at first say they must be put to death for trespassing, though the Adrata's Vizsier decides to just have them arrested for the time being instead after an interaction with Romana. As they're being taken to Lady Adrata, they get ambushed as a bunch of metal thieves come in and try to steal their metal, which is an incredibly valuable commodity on Chloris due to its lack of it. Romana gets taken in the ambush as The Doctor is brought to Ladry Adrasta who is interested in learning about the egg itself and what the travellers know about it. Though Romana quickly manages to free herself with the help of K9, the danger isn't over for the TARDIS crew yet, as their dealing with the whims of the tyrannical Lady Adrata and if they get on the wrong side of her, they might just have to face the terror of the creature from the pit(eyyy).

Episode Proper

Well that was a fast end to good episodes, real nosedive in quality this is from City of Death. The Creature from the Pit, not an awful episode, but not really that good of one either, it’s an alright watch but definitely one of the more forgettable episodes I’ve come across so far on my watch through of the Tom Baker era. This episode just failed to really grab me all that much, and though I did have fun with some parts of the episode, it was not really one that really captured my imagination or anything like that, which coupled with the flaws that the episode does have, makes it one I wasn’t really all that thrilled by coming out of it. The whole episode sort of washed over me and just didn’t leave much of an impact on me, which makes sense as out of all of The 4th Doctor stories there are, this is one of the ones I’ve heard the least about; now I can see why.

The episode premise itself is pretty simple and not really the most engaging when put simply, basically just being about a tyrannical ruler who holds a monopoly on the planet’s most precious commodity and keeps a monster held in a pit that she uses to execute people, though of course there is more going on than meets the eye. That idea isn’t the most gripping out of the ones we’ve had beforehand like two intelligent races locked in a logical stalemate or an alien trying to steal the Mona Lisa, in comparison it didn’t really grab me as those other two. Not to say it’s a bad story idea of anything, it just wasn’t one that really got me all that invested in what was going on in this story; of course there are interesting things that can be done with the concept as long as it develops in a cool and interesting way from there, which the episode does kind of do.

Despite my lack of enthusiasm for really talking about this episode, I feel nothing that strong for it, not love but I don’t particularly dislike it either, there was some stuff I did genuinely enjoy about the episode. The whole idea of a metal shortage on a planet that has advanced to a sort of Middle Ages is pretty interesting and plays well with different planets materials, making it so certain things that are common on Earth become incredibly rare on other worlds with different make up. It’s utilized well with the villain, Lady Adrasta, who holds the monopoly on metal and uses that to hold great power and influence over the rest of the people, informing her motivation over the entire episode as she attempts to maintain this monopoly over all those who would try and infringe on it.

I liked how the episode utilized the whole metal shortage aspect of it, with there also being a bunch of metal bandits who steal the metal from roaming guards in order to try and pilfer whatever they can to make a fortune, eventually teaming up with one of Lady Adrasta’s people to try and pilfer a metal shortage for themselves. The episode does well to touch on themes of greed and corruption and how people will often hurt their own people and even the future prospects of their society just to maintain power and control; something which is still frighteningly relevant to today. This is especially well done with the reveal of the trade deal and the attempts by two different parties to stop it and keep the monopoly on metal before it becomes worthless, with that scene of K9 destroying the precious metal of the bandits being pretty impactful as otherwise they were willing to risk the destruction of their world for this power and wealth; definitely some of the most effective stuff in this episode which I did really enjoy.

The mystery of the egg was also pretty good, with it giving some nice intrigue which I enjoyed as there are questions about the origins of the egg and what its purpose was for, especially as The Doctor and Romana picked up a strange signal from it that adds to that mystery of just what is going on with it. The desire of Lady Adrasta to know the secret also helped the mystery, especially when she changed her tune to wanting to destroy the creature, making it clear there is a connection between them. I liked the scenes in the pit dealing with the creature with it doing well to add to the episode’s intrigue, with some good tense moments dealing with the titular creature and trying to figure out just what its deal actually is as we begin to learn more about which I found pretty interesting.

I really loved the reveal of what the creature from the pit(eyyy) actually is and its connection with all the other pieces that this episode has built up, like the strange piece of metal in Lady Adrasta’s office, the pieces of egg, and the metal shortage. It makes for a solid finale as the truth of the situation is laid bare in an excellent confrontation scene between everyone in the story up to this point where we learn who the creature really is, a delegate named Erato who had been imprisoned by Lady Adratsa because the trading agreement he proposed would threaten her monopoly and control over the rest of the populace, which is why she desperately wanted to kill him before the truth got out. This portion of the story was so good and served to tie up a lot of the plot threads in a cool and satisfying way which I really enjoyed.

For some reason though the episode still keeps going after this really good ending point though. Lady Adratsa literally died and Erato is freed so it really feels like the episode is over, but somehow it still keeps going for like 13 minutes on from that point, introducing a second climax involving Erato’s species having launched a destructive star to blow up the planet in retaliation for the capture and presumed death of Erato, which leads to a whole bunch of running to different places and technobabble to stop the star that can’t help but feel so incredibly tacked on. While there were some good scenes in this last portion of the story, the one with K9 destroying the metal was excellent, it can’t help but feel so unnecessary and like it was just included to drag part 4 out into a full runtime instead of leaving half a part down. It was tedious and it very much did help in dragging this episode down for me, as I was left waiting for it to end; they really should’ve stopped while they were ahead. 

Pacing, Sets, and Special Effects

The pacing for this episode was fairly good, it flowed well enough even if it was a bit slow at parts, doing a decent job until the ending portion. By that point the pacing takes a real downturn and makes this episode feel like a slog with a whole second climax that feels unnecessary and unearned, feeling like it’s just there to fill up space so the episode can make it to the necessary runtime. It feels like the same problem at the end of The Power of Kroll, though the pacing here was much better than it was there, even if this second climax does drag the episode out more than the former. I sincerely believe that this could’ve and should’ve been a 3 parter, trim a couple of the slow moments and cut out a bit of filler and you could easily cut this episode down one part into a nice and much better 3 parter. The pacing for the entire episode isn’t the worst, just a little slow which leads to the major problem of the ending portion dragging it on for time; it’s not great.

The sets for this episode were pretty good, I liked the jungle location for the outside shots with that stuff looking nice, with the indoor shots of the palace and the underground caves looking fairly good as well. The special effects for this episode were your usual fare of cheap effects, nothing much of note to them, though I did like the little brussel sprout looking creatures that Lady Adratsa commands. The most infamous special effect in this episode is of course, the titular Creature from the pit, which looks pretty bad. The design lives up to its reputation of being incredibly phallic looking, with the tentacle-like thing of Erato being the worst offender, don’t even get me started when The Doctor puts his mouth on the damn thing; it does give this episode a hilarious so bad it’s good quality which I liked, helped to liven things up. The rest of Erato looks pretty bad, the size is impressive but at the end of the day Erato looks like a deflated green balloon with lights on it more than anything; definitely one of the silliest costumes we’ve seen so far.  

Erato

Erato was a fun creature for this episode, despite his incredibly shitty and phallic looking design, which admittedly made him a lot funnier. The intrigue surrounding Erato was pretty neat with it being interesting seeing us learn more about the creature that dwells in the pit, especially with each part we do learn about it answering some questions while raising other, as we learn the creature moving about is only part of a much larger creature that doesn’t really seem to be that hostile or even acknowledge them all that much. I loved how alien of a creature Erato is, being this ginormous blob that feels so unlike a lot of creatures that came before, with the way he can separate chunks of himself to move around or weave cocoon space ships and barriers pretty easily being incredibly interesting to me, with it being nice that they were having fun with what this really alien creature can do.

I really liked how Erato can communicate, having the device that allows it to essentially use other people’s voices in order to talk for them, depending on whoever is touching the device, since these beings normally lack the ability for vocal communication due to lack of those structures to do so. This means Tom Baker, Lalla Ward, and the Lady Adrastas actress Mya Francis get in on the fray of each individually voicing Erato during the scenes in which he needs to talk. I liked the reveal with him not being a harmful creature actually being pretty intelligent being, a Tythonian, who genuinely wanted to help both his people and the people of Chloris by proposing the trade agreement that would benefit both as their planet has a lot of metal and Chloris has a lot of chlorophyll which is what they seek, with it actually being Lady Adrasta's selfishness that caused him to be imprisoned; which he does still hold a bit of a grudge against even after being free before The Doctor assures him the rest of the people aren’t like her. Erato was a solid monster for this episode with a neat twist and fun alien feel which I really liked.

Lady Adrasta

Lady Adrasta was an excellent villain for this episode, being a good bit of fun as she tries to maintain her control over her people and the monopoly on the metal supply. Lady Adrasta is a character who could’ve easily been forgettable to me but her actress, Mya Francis, does such a good job in the part that I couldn’t help but enjoy her character as a delightfully wicked villain who wants to keep all the power and control to herself and doesn’t care what she has to do to get it. She is a good threat and powerful figure, owning the monopoly of all metal which she uses to rule with an iron(heh) first and makes sure people won’t act out of line with her rule, throwing whoever does into the pit. I like the intrigue with Lady Adrasta as it’s quick to see something is up with her, from her desperation to figure out what the egg exactly is, to her immediate switch to trying to destroy the creature after learning K9 has the capability to do so, it makes her incredibly suspicious.

It’s clear she does know a lot more than she cares to let on with her dropping some slips of the tongue by accident that confirm that she has information on the creature she honestly shouldn’t know, which builds up well to the reveal that the being was diplomat sent to make a trade agreement who she locked up to maintain her monopoly on metal, not wanting it it be threatened by the prospect of trade. It does such a great job at showing how she would do anything to keep her rule, even if it means holding her people back from something that would genuinely be beneficial to them just because it allows her to maintain power and status; something that is very much not unheard of even in the modern day. The whole confrontation with her was great, seeing her fairly cool demeanor give way as she screams and panics to not let the truth be let out before being forced to let Erato use her voice and telling the honest truth, who then kills her in revenge for her horrid treatment of him for several years; a satisfying end to her. Mya Francis did an excellent job as Lady Adrasta being a lot of fun and bringing some real life into this character who would otherwise feel dull I think, she did really well in the role.

Supporting Cast

The rest of the supporting cast for this episode was fairly good, fulfilling their roles well even if they're not the most memorable of characters. I liked the metal bandits, they were good fun, with some funny banter that helped to liven up the story, especially with the instance of the rest to do things democratically much to the annoyance of the one who clearly thinks of himself as their leader. I also enjoyed the character of Organon, an astrologist who is clearly a phony that was thrown in the pit and found by The Doctor when he goes down there, with him being a lot of fun, getting some good banter with Tom Baker as the two traverse the pit. He had some funny lines which I enjoyed, like when Lady Adrasta sees him and asks why he isn’t dead to which he replies he did certainly try to die. Organon is played pretty well by Geofferey Bayldon who did well to bring the humor to the part which I enjoyed.

The Doctor

The Doctor was good here, with some fun moments here and there, though really nothing to write home about. I do really like the opening of this story with The Doctor dealing with Romana who's going through a bunch of his old things and wondering what he's doing with all the junk. It's pretty funny to see how many random things The Doctor has collected and hoarded over his travels, especially when he dismisses the distress signal receiver which he unplugged to stop getting missions from the Time Lords which feels very much in character for this incarnation. I enjoyed the sequence in part 1 where they're cornered by Lady Adrasta's men, with us getting to see Tom Baker running around in a stock and beating up some men while in the middle of an ambush. I did like when he meets up with Lady Adratra with it being funny seeing him surprised at the fact that the villain actually respects and compliments him, acting offended at first but then realizing what she's saying. This attempt at respect is of course to try and get him to give her some information she wants, which The Doctor doesn't and leads to a really funny cliffhanger of The Doctor willingly jumping inside the pit; which he also in a funny line admitted was an unoriginal name for it.

There isn't too much in the rest of the story that's too memorable for me with The Doctor outside of the opening part, and that's probably due to the fact I watched it twice after my first attempt to watch the story was interrupted by personal reasons, though there are a few moments I did enjoy. I found the moment really amusing following the cliffhanger with him hanging on and trying to pull out a book as he puts in a pike to make sure he's doing it right before pulling out another book to help him read the first one since it was in Tibetan; good comedy scene. I already mentioned I liked Organon with his interactions with The Doctor being pretty good and welcome given how little of note the wandering around the titular pit actually is. I do enjoy seeing The Doctor trying to figure out more about the titular creature and communicate with it, if not just because it leads to that really funny moment of The Doctor putting his mouth on the creature's thing. Finally there's the confrontation scene with Lady Adrasta and giving the creature their voice disk back was excellent, having some good fun action and solid lines from The 4th Doctor as he lays into her and the plot she's been covering up; though it's the last good bit before the episode goes into the slog like I mentioned. Tom Baker was pretty good in this story, giving a fun performance and doing well getting more serious during that confrontation sequence, with his acting once more helping to bring life into a bit of a slow story.

K9

K9 is actually in this story for a change after barely being in the last two, though even here he is rather left to the backburner for a fair bit of the story, being on low power. The most notable thing about K9 in this story, and probably this story in general, is the fact that it's the first story sporting K9's new voice David Brierley, who would voice K9 for the rest of the season. I'm not too familiar with the BTS to understand why they couldn't get John Leeson this season, but it was certainly rather a shock hearing the different voice and I don't really like it. No disrespect to Brierley who does a good job in the role but Leeson's voice was just perfect for K9 and anyone would struggle to match it in any way as his voice really is just what you'd think of when you think K9, fitting the design and character of the tin dog so well. I also personally don't like how human his take on K9's voice is compared to Leeson's, with it feeling much less like a machine or animal and feeling a bit too pompous for K9, if that's possible. It just doesn't match up with K9 for me and feels like it should be to a different character; again Brierley isn't bad, he actually does a good job, but I just can't help but compare to the original, and in my opinion more fitting voice of K9.

To speak on his actual part in the story itself, K9 is also just good, getting some decent bits and participation in the story, primarily in the form of laser blasts. I do find it funny seeing K9 get surrounded by the balls of weeds and overwhelmed, being wrapped in webbing; a rather amusing sight for sure. I also did like the detail, similarly to The Armageddon Factor of K9 almost being taken apart for scraps, though here saved by Romana saying he information about the egg is in his data banks and can't be damaged. K9 spends a fair bit of this story unable to move and on low power, not having much energy for blasts after the attack, though even then he gets some decent snark like assuring Lady Adrasta that he's not made of tin. It is fun seeing K9 get these interactions one on one with the villain and having this agency here that he really didn't in the last two stores, even getting some fun moment like ordering the guards where to go as they're moving him around or him saying the shell is unbreakable followed by The Doctor immediately breaking through it with ease; that and some fun action for the final confrontation were some good bits from K9. Though it'll take a bit for me to get used to the new voice, David Brierley still does a good job as K9 here, playing the tin dog quite well; the puppeteers for him are good here, especially given he stays still for most of this story.

Romana

Romana is alright here, having some decent snark but otherwise feeling very underutilized here. I liked the start of this story with Romana going through The Doctor's things and criticizing the amount of stuff he's piled up over the years unorganized, with the following moment of her plugging in the transmitter that's supposed to be on the TARDIS being pretty amusing and nice show of the different ways the two Time Lords go about things. After getting a brief bit of investigating with The Doctor, she spends a good portion of this story captured, first by the bandits and then by Lady Adrasta for the rest of the episode. Still I do like how she doesn't remain still while she is captured and is fairly able to stand on her own, using the dog whistle to call K9 to help her escape or being able to stop K9 from being dismantled and trying to find ways out of her situation.

I really enjoyed Romana's snark in this story, with it helping to keep her fun even if she isn't given much to do, with her getting some good lines in here such as introducing herself as the commander and The Doctor as her subordinate for a change. Still there remains the main issue I have with Romana here, where she feels too reliant on K9 here, doesn't really feel she gets much of her own thing to do here after the opening. Romana's only role here feels like just to tell K9 to do certain things and feels unable to do much without him here. It feels like we went right back to Destiny in how little impact there actually is for her in this story, you could really take her out and have K9 fill in the rest and it doesn't feel like much would change honestly. Lalla Ward still does a good job here as Romana, playing her snark quite well, and definitely tries her best to breathe some more life into what is otherwise a rather lackluster appearance for her character

Closing Thoughts/TLDR

As a whole this was such a disappointing dive after the phenomenal City of Death, with The Creature from the Pit, while not being the worst episode, only being an alright watch at best and a rather forgettable story at that. The actual story proper is decent but nothing too notable that grabbed me either, I like the metal shortage aspect of the plot as well as mystery of the egg, with both leading to a solid confrontation at the end, but still doesn't help that a good part of the plot just isn't memorable and just sort of washed over me. The pacing is alright but slow for most of the story before having The Power of Kroll problem but even worse this time as after the good confrontation with Lady Adrasta part 4 spends like 15 minutes adding another threat just to pass out the runtime in one of the worst cases I've seen thus far in my watch through; really should've just been a 3 parter. The sets are good here, with the jungle planet looking nice, and special effects are alright to rather phallic looking with the infamous props used for Erato, the creature, looking like a phallic deflated green balloon. Erato was a fun creature for the story though, I liked the intrigue surrounding him and learning the truth behind him being trapped there and that he's not hostile with his way of communication being really novel and interesting. Lady Adrata was an excellent villain for this story being good fun as we see her attempts to maintain her power and cover her tracks; Mya Francis helps bring some life into what could've been a dull character. The rest of the supporting cast was alright, though I did quite like Organon, finding him quite fun actually. The Doctor was good here with some fun moments though still one of the weaker outings with him. K9 is back in action with some good bits even if I'm struggling a bit to accept the new voice he has; again the actor is not bad but it personally doesn't feel like K9 to me. Romana is alright, with her feeling rather underutilized here and being too tied to K9 which is a shame after a strong appearance last time. Overall this was a story I hold no strong feelings for whatsoever, outside of the tedium of an ending, the whole thing came in and after this review I'll probably forget most stuff about it; could be worse but could be a lot better.

Next time: The TARDIS crew end up finding out what it's like to get in the middle of a fenderbender between two spaceships traveling in Hyperspace. Though they try to help the situation, it becomes clear there's more at work here, as this story makes it clear that they're doing what no Doctor Who story in the show had done before, tackle the topic of drugs; get ready for a very special episode of Doctor Who, tonight at 8:00.

Final Rating: 4/10

"Well, to be fair, I did have a couple of gadgets which he probably didn't, like a teaspoon and an open mind."

-The Doctor, delivering a funny line and one that is a bit iconic for me from him, though from having heard it in Babbelcolor's every Doctor Who story video and not this story specifically

Recently rewatched the Five Doctors, the Dalek in the death zone had a notch on top of its dome.
Any reasons (both prop wise or Dalek law?)
I did check it’s on the previous Peter Davidson story too.. but not on the character options models..

Pete McTighe has been approached by some production companies as their choice to show run if they pitch for the show...

Please no.

Seriously no.

This is not what Doctor Who needs.

We need a completely different feel, style, tone to what came before, and a complete break away from what has been done with the show in Nu-who..

Pete McTighe is not that, he is RTDs second in command.

The show needs fresh new voices. We need someone completely new in charge. Someone with true vision, not someone who writes a episode like Lucky Day or helps make the poor spin-off show The War Between a Good Title.

Honestly, if he gets the gig it would just show me that the BBC haven't got a clue, that they don't understand what needs to be done.

Nothing against the guy, he would be a good choice as a writer to come in and do a historical episode in one of the seasons, but he should not be running the show imo.

Thoughts?

"The control freak and the man who should never be controlled. You'd go to hell, if she asked. And she would."

>!Did Missy kill Danny Pink?!<

In order for Missy's plan to kick into gear as far as The Doctor investigating is concerned, Clara has to have a reason to want him to take her to "hell."

So did Missy hit Danny with a car? Did she arrange for someone to hit him with the car? The alternative would be for her to find someone who died who was in a relationship with someone like Clara, and work backward to get that person involved with The Doctor.

But she had to have something to do with it in some respect.

Thoughts?

This may sound super pedantic but am I the only one that can't get over the fact that December in the UK is portrayed as sunny, garden party weather, with full green trees and insects buzzing in the background; when a UK winter is the exact opposite?

It's a fantastic episode and the aesthetic absolutely works for the murder mystery vibe; but it seems an oddly obvious oversight. It's not just a nice day, it's clearly in the middle of summer lol

My favourite dr who actors are Tom baker. Sylvester McCoy. David tenant. Matt smith Peter. And my less actors are Whittaker and Ncuti Gatwa I think thare sessions seem cheep compared to the others

Hi - just wondering if anyone else has managed to pull a vortex card yet? I was fortunate enough to pull a silver curator the other day but haven’t seen much about the gold curator or the moment cards

Just last night I finished watching Capaldi's era as The Twelfth Doctor and well let's just say I was all puddles 😭 . When I first started Doctor Who with Nine as my first Doctor it was on Netflix ( my how the years have flown by ) and after 12 that was when hbo max got the streaming rights to the series. I watched Jodie Whitaker's first series years ago, I don't remember much, only that I didn't care for it. It didn't have much to do with her, I'm sure she put her all into it, it had way more to do with the writing and how inconsistent the Doctor and her morality felt from episode to episode.

Despite that I always intended to watch her other series' in the hopes that it would get better, I never got around to it though, life kept happening and I never got around to it. Well after Twelve's ending I am giving the Thirteenth Doctor another go, I ordered the blu-ray for her first series, after I finish that I will do the same and watch all of her 2nd and 3rd series, with that I will be jumping into new territory, Dr Who content that I have never seen before. Hopefully it has aged better than I remember and the Thirteenth Doctor will be another era to the franchise that I can watch with excitement and look back fondly on. For all of the fans of 13 out there, without spoilers tell me why you love her era and what makes her iteration special to you.

What would you name them?

Classic Who:

Season 1 - Adventures in Space and Time

Season 2 - Wanderers of the Fourth Dimension

Season 3 - Time of Death

Season 4 - Renewal

Season 5 - Evils of the Galaxy

Season 6 - Time is Relative

Season 7 - The Exile to Earth

Season 8 - Enmity of Ages

Season 9 - Masters of Time

Season 10 - Love from Gallifrey

Season 11 - Moment of Truth

Season 12 - Free Cosmos

Season 13 - Gothic Horrors

Season 14 - Noble Savage

Season 15 - The Land of Dreams and Fantasy

Season 16 - Key to Time

Season 17 - Random Slips in Time

Season 18 - Entropy

Season 19 - A Shipshape Team

Season 20 - Many Unhappy Returns

Season 21 - Brave Heart

Season 22 - Timely Change

Season 23 - Trial of a Time Lord

Season 24 - Holidays Like Crazy Paving

Season 25 - Secrets of the Time Lords

Season 26 - Universe of Terrors

New Who:

Series 1 - Survivors of the Time War

Series 2 - Defenders of Earth

Series 3 - The Lonely God (or) Curse of the Time Lords

Series 4 - The Children of Time

2009 Specials - The End Times

Series 5 - The Cracks in Time

Series 6 - Silence Will Fall

Series 7 - Fall of the Eleventh

2013 Specials - The First Question

Series 8 - Keeper of the Nethersphere (or) The Promised Land

Series 9 - The Coming of the Hybrid

Series 10 - Doctor's Oath

Series 11 - Aliens in Sheffield

Series 12 - Creation Myths

Series 13 - Flux

2022 Specials - The Woman Who Fell to Time

60th Anniversary Specials - Old Faces

Season 1 - The One Who Waits

Season 2 - The Unholy Trinity

What other stories in the EU show The Doctor's first meeting with an established villain?

There's not many recurring villains who we don't see first encountered on screen, so it must be a pretty small list.

In this regular thread, talk about anything Doctor-Who-related you've recently infosorbed. Have you just read the latest Twelfth Doctor comic? Did you listen to the newest Fifth Doctor audio last week? Did you finish a Faction Paradox book a few days ago? Did you finish a book that people actually care about a few days ago? Want to talk about it without making a whole thread? This is the place to do it!

Please remember that future spoilers must be tagged.

Regular Posts Schedule

• Latest No Stupid Questions
  
• Latest Rewatch
  
• Previous What's Who With You
  
• Latest Free Talk Friday

This post is part of a series of reviews. To see them all, click here.

Historical information found on Shannon Sullivan's Doctor Who website (relevant page here) and the TARDIS Wiki (relevant page here)). Primary/secondary source material can be found in the source sections of Sullivan's website, and rarely as inline citations on the TARDIS Wiki.

Story Information

• Episode: Series 7, Episode 9
• Airdate: 20th April 2013
• Doctor: 11th
• Companion: Clara
• Writer: Neil Cross
• Director: Jamie Payne
• Showrunner: Steven Moffat

Review

It does tend to haunt you. Living after so much of…of the other thing. – Professor Alec Palmer

I don't think I've ever had as difficult a time evaluating a Doctor Who story as I've had with "Hide". By that I don't just mean how much I liked said story, or even if I did, but also how to parse out its various elements, and what its place in the series even is. "Hide" is a confusing mess of a good ideas, bad ideas, good ideas done poorly, and bad ideas given interesting shape. That in spite of being, plot-wise a pretty straightforwards story, albeit with a last second twist that, while honestly coming out of nowhere, at least had some merit.

Perhaps this makes sense given this one's production history. "Hide" was the first episode filmed for the second half of series 7. Before even that, writer Neil Cross had precious little to go on for the personality of the new companion. For one thing, when he first started developing the script, he thought he'd be writing for a Victorian governess named Beryl. Even when he knew he'd be writing for a modern woman named Clara, as far as her personality went, all he had to work with was Jenna Coleman's audition for a part that wasn't Clara, but rather for her character from "Asylum of the Daleks". Even setting that aside, the basic conceit for this episode changed a couple times from earliest scripts to final product (see "Stray Observations" for more details). All things considered, Neil Cross had his work cut out for him.

"Hide" makes a lot of sense in that context. Clara feels…off in this episode (and not just because she calls the TARDIS a "grumpy old cow" at one point). It's funny because Clara's only really gotten surface level characterization to this point, whereas "Hide" is the first episode to give moments, if only moments, of genuine depth. But apart from those moments, it's really hard to connect the version of Clara seen here, to the version seen to this point in Series 7. And it's easy to believe that that's because neither the writer nor Jenna Coleman herself really had a good sense of her yet. The concept changing through the writing process can be felt too. It's felt in that weird final twist I mentioned above. It's felt in the way the plot of the episode basically survives on pure atmosphere, without more substance.

Though that atmosphere is quite successful. If there are successes in "Hide" I kind of suspect that Director Jamie Payne deserves a lot of the credit. The caveat is, I always have a lot of trouble parsing out directorial influence from other aspects. That being said, Payne really effectively creates that haunted house atmosphere that sustains much of the episode. When the actions moves out of Caliburn house into an extra-dimensional forest, the way that that is shot perfectly encapsulates that feeling of danger and mystery that the woods often provide. And the design and effects work probably deserves mentioning here. Much of the episode concerns trying to find out about a ghost, called the "Witch of the Well", who appears at the Calliburn house, and the way she's rendered is suitably creepy. Later things move on and we're instead concerned with a creature, referred to in the credits as the "Crooked Man". For this Payne suggested using mostly practical effects via a rig, which is what happened. In addition, the Crooked Man's movements were actually filmed in reverse, then played "forwards" to make its movements more unnerving. The end result is genuinely unsettling, combined with the well-tested trick of only showing portions of the "monster".

But first we have to deal with the ghost. The Witch of the Well has been haunting Calliburn House for as long as anyone can remember. She always appears to be facing the same direction, regardless of your perspective, as evidenced by all of the photographs. And Calliburn house features a bunch of classic ghostly elements: cold spots, mysterious voices, disembodied hands grabbing yours, mysterious knocking noises, and so on. So naturally, a ghost hunter, Alec Palmer and a psychic, Emma Grayling, have set up residence in Calliburn House to try and determine the nature of these phenomena.

Alec Palmer is, of course, a fictional character. But he doesn't feel like it. This episode is written like a celebrity historical about Alec Palmer. When we first meet him, the Doctor rattles off his life story. This is possibly because Palmer was meant to be Bernard Quatermass, the star of several BBC science fiction serials beginning in 1953 with The Quatermass Experiment. Rights issues prevented that from happening, but it feels like the way Palmer is introduced is an artifact of the Quatermass connection (even if Palmer's biography is entirely different from Quatermass'). It makes for kind of an odd introduction, regardless of the reason. The Doctor is constantly spouting off a bunch of biographical details about this guy that aren't really relevant to the plot.

In spite of this, Professor Palmer and Emma Grayling are a perfectly acceptable duo. I didn't love them, but they're sweet together. Palmer is haunted by his time in the war, which allows him and the Doctor to connect over similar traumas. Meanwhile, Emma's powers have caused her to live a very lonely life. Though what allows her and Clara to connect is something different. The relationship between Palmer and Emma is clearly meant to reflect the growing relationship between Clara and the Doctor. Including the romantic bits. And while Emma and Palmer feel like a perfectly natural couple, applying this to our leads bugs me.

Now, Clara and the Doctor's relationship will eventually grow to be quite complex, even romantic in a very strange way. But to this point we've seen no indications that either has feelings for the other. The Doctor is more interested in Clara as a mystery to be solved, while Clara…is frankly a bit of a blank slate. I don't think it's really been established how she feels about the Doctor to any meaningful degree, other than generally admiring him. And I feel like before you can build a romantic relationship between these two, we need to see signs of how they feel about each other beyond that. Frankly, the fact that in four episodes together this is the first sense we're getting of how these two feel about each other to any meaningful degree is problematic in and of itself.

Emma also has an odd view of the Doctor. She warns Clara not to trust him, saying "there's a sliver of ice in his heart", but this isn't meaningfully followed up on in this episode. In fact Emma herself is pretty trusting of the Doctor throughout, as he repeatedly uses her to build a bridge between Calliburn House and the pocket dimension where the ghostly emanations are coming from. This process is painful and draining by the way (and he admits before they do it the first time he has no idea what effect it will have on her). Honestly this wouldn't bug me except the "sliver of ice in his heart" never really comes into play, either in this episode or in the future. It could be related to the Doctor having brought Clara aboard the TARDIS for hidden reasons, but that phrase feels a bit bigger than that. Like Emma is describing some fundamental flaw of the Doctor's.

Of course the episode ends and we learn that the Doctor came to Calliburn House first and foremost for Emma Grayling. Specifically to ask her about Clara. Emma is of no help here, only revealing that Clara is an ordinary woman. She tells us a few things about Clara that we basically already knew. The real point of all of this is to let the audience and the Doctor know that whatever's going on with the whole "Impossible Girl" thing, Clara is unaware of it. Beyond that, the scene feels a little tacked on, but basically fine.

Before all that happens though, we have a switch of focus. The "ghost" turns out to be a woman trapped in a bubble universe, named Hila Tacorien. The Doctor goes into the bubble universe to discover that there seems to be a monster chasing her, explaining why she was calling out for help (explaining in turn, why she was heard screaming). This is the aforementioned "Crooked Man". So the Crooked Man seems like he's going to be the threat of the episode. We do a whole chase through the bubble universe, getting Hila out and stranding the Doctor, Clara somehow pilots the TARDIS (I'll come back to this) to the bubble universe, gets the Doctor out and everything seems to be wrapping up. It's revealed that Hila is a descendant of Emma (and probably Alec Palmer, but the Emma bit is the important part for psychic reasons).

And then the Doctor realizes there was nothing sinister about the Crooked Man, but he just wanted to be with the woman he loved (the Crooked Woman?). So the Doctor goes into the bubble universe one last time, and the episode ends on him, Clara and the TARDIS saving the Crooked Man. This as a final twist is fine but very rushed. The explanation feels a bit ad hoc and we don't really get a good reason for why the Doctor comes to the conclusion that the Crooked Man is benign, much less for why he's apparently in a love story. The elements are there but it feels a bit threadbare.

But that's a problem with the episode as a whole. For all of the great atmosphere, very little feels like it's actually explained. There's a bit where the Doctor realizes he's standing in a cold spot and so, after some experimentation, uses some chalk to draw a circle outlining the borders of the cold spot. Later we see smoke coming from the exact area on the floor where he's drawn his chalk circle. And…that's the last we hear of the cold spot. Other details, like the mysterious knocking or the hand that grabs Clara's hand get something vaguely resembling explanations, but it all ends up feeling very under developed. Like we were trying to do the thing where the episode gives scientific explanations for apparently supernatural phenomena, but it just kind of gave up halfway through.

There's honestly not a lot to talk about with the Doctor this episode but, as I suggested above, I do think that Clara gets a bit more than usual. For one thing this episode is the first to really start developing her relationship with the TARDIS. We got a hint in "Rings of Akhaten" that the TARDIS didn't like Clara, and can infer that it's something to do with the "Impossible Girl" stuff. Here however we get a proper expansion of that. It gets taken to a bit of an extreme though. I'm not a fan of the TARDIS being able to talk through projections, especially not to the degree it does here. I didn't love it "Let's Kill Hitler", but at the very least we got some interesting character stuff for the Doctor there. However here the only thing we get is that the TARDIS thinks Clara is self-obsessed. While this will actually somewhat bear out down the line, we've not really seen much indication of it to this point. More to the point however, it makes it feel like the TARDIS has some sort of an issue with Clara's personality, rather than something fundamental about her, which is where one assumes the idea of the TARDIS not liking Clara comes from. The two do eventually come to an agreement to save the Doctor…where the TARDIS seems to either pilot itself or let Clara do some piloting. Either way doesn't really work for me. If it's the former, TARDISes have always required some kind of pilot to operate even if, as was the case in the black and white era, the pilot was pretty limited in their control. Meanwhile, if it's the latter, then how the hell could Clara even do basic piloting of the TARDIS? At least when Leela piloted the TARDIS in The Invisible Enemy the Doctor gave her the coordinates and you could maybe infer some level of tutoring from the Doctor. I still don't buy that Leela could pilot the TARDIS in that story, but it's marginally more plausible than what we see here.

On the other hand, we do get a really great moment of characterization for Clara. It's small, but it gives her more than she's gotten to this point. The Doctor takes the TARDIS for a jaunt throughout time to take pictures of Hila in her ghostly form. The point of this is to show that, rather than frozen in a moment, Hila is actually experiencing the passage of time, just much slower than we do. However in doing so the Doctor takes Clara from the creation of Earth to its dying days. And Clara's reaction, "Have we just watched the entire life cycle of Earth, birth to death?" is really interesting to me. That she wants to reflect on something like that, I think does actually say something deeper about Clara. Now even this kind of gets pushed to an odd place, as Clara's very poetic observation that "we're [humans] all ghosts to you" is really just used for Impossible Girl stuff, as the focus on the Doctor's reaction makes clear. If that wasn't clear Clara's questioning what humans could mean to someone like the Doctor triggers a response that is somewhat specific to Clara: "you are the only mystery worth solving", though I do think the Doctor is pushing that out to be about humanity as a whole.

Still even in this I think Clara shows kind of an interesting perspective as she tries to understand the Doctor. We've had conversations like this before, like Rose realizing that her mother is dead in the time of "The End of the World", but I think the way Clara approaches this point shows a different perspective. She's almost confrontational about it, but in a way that shows an awe for the Doctor. Looking at the Doctor and wondering how he could view a human like her as anything worthwhile. Clara's got an ego, as her conversation with the TARDIS hinted, but she's early in her journey. And we've seen already in a couple of ways that she kind of feels small and insignificant a lot of the time. It finally does start to make a little sense of the hints of characterization we've seen for her so far. It's just a moment, and frankly, it's not enough to make up for how little we've gotten for Clara so far, but for that same reason, I'll take what I can get.

And "Hide" does have a lot going for it. Especially in the atmosphere department, where it really does feel like we're doing the haunted house concept justice. The design work is incredible, and Jamie Payne's direction is excellent. And hell, for a minute, Clara feels like she might be becoming a fully realized character. It's only a moment though, and otherwise she actually feels a bit out of character. And otherwise, "Hide" feels a bit lacking in substance. The plot never really comes together, and while the first twist with the ghost not actually being a ghost or evil works pretty well, the Crooked Man twist comes too late to feel properly developed. A lot of that atmosphere kind of falls apart as well because it doesn't feel like it's properly explained either, and while I liked Professor Alec Palmer and Emma Grayling, neither character is a strong enough presence to save this one.

Oh and the title's pretty meaningless all things told.

Score: 3/10

Stray Observations

• Writer Neil Cross was a longtime Doctor Who fan, who'd been watching since the 3rd Doctor era when he was growing up. He'd hoped to write for the show during the RTD era, but scheduling conflicts preventing him from doing so.
• The writing process for this episode (as well as his other work in Series 7, though this actually came first in the writing process) involved no face to face meetings with showrunner Steven Moffat due to Cross living in New Zealand. He and his family did fly into Wales to watch the filming however.
• Director Jamie Payne had Cross' children be "monster consultants" – ie they were asked if the Crooked Man was scary enough.
• This was the first episode filmed with Jenna Coleman as a series regular (ie, not including "Asylum of the Daleks"), in part due to the lateness of Steven Moffat's scripts for "The Snowmen". She was somewhat nervous about doing an episode before her introduction, but Moffat and Jamie Payne were able to reassure her.
• Early versions of the script had the "Hex" dimension be represented by a version of Caliburn House, as seen in daytime. Steven Moffat felt that the concept needed something larger scale, and suggested an eerie wood instead. Later the term "Hex" was mostly removed via ADR. One reference does remain, probably because Matt Smith says the word "Hex" while the camera is pointed directly at his face. Kind of hard to ADR over that.
• In those earlier versions of the script, the Hex was the prison of the Lost Lord, a Time Lord who had passed into legend on Gallifrey. The Lost Lord would have attempted to tempt the Doctor into the Hex, at which point he could feed on the Doctor to return to the normal universe and absorb all time.
• The Doctor and Clara introduce themselves to Palmer with a Ghostbusters reference…making this the second story to pull that, after the Doctor and Rose made a Ghostbusters reference back in "Army of Ghosts". Personally…I find both instances incredibly cringeworthy.
• Clara declares that the opposite of bliss is Carlisle. I feel bad for the people of Carlisle, who from photos, seem to live in quite a charming English city. Maybe there's some reason why Carlisle is so despised by Clara (and the Doctor, who agrees with the assertion), but I don't know it.
• The Doctor references having once had a place to put an umbrella in the TARDIS. Indeed the hatstand was a somewhat recurring feature of the TARDIS interior during the 5th Doctor era, though it had a tendency to disappear or reappear between stories. I didn't track this at the time because it's not the sort of thing I tend to notice.
• The Doctor uses a blue crystal from Metebelis III. A similar crystal was used occasionally in the 3rd Doctor era, first seen in The Green Death after the Doctor had spent the majority of the season trying to get to Metebelis III. That was eventually resolved in Planet of the Spiders, Jon Pertwee's final story as the Doctor.
• Matt Smith also mangles the pronunciation of "Metebelis", putting the emphasis on the 2nd, rather than 3rd syllable.
• The Doctor also uses a different object that looks oddly like a crystal which he says is a "subset of the Eye of Harmony"…whatever that actually means.
• The Doctor just kind of decides that the "Crooked Man" in the alternate dimension is the male one. Setting aside the possibility of a non-straight relationship, how exactly did he make that determination?

Next Time: You wouldn't think an expedition through the TARDIS would be a waste of the audience's time.

Whether it be your favourite episodes of all time, or just a guilty pleasure episode you put on in the background to pass the time. I want to know what your most rewatched doctor who stories are, how many times you’ve watched them (if you know) and why you rewatch them?

I personally find much of the 11th doctor era rewatchable with the pandorica two parter (my favourite story) and impossible astronaut two parter being some of what i’ve seen most. There is a lot more that i tend to rewatch from series 1-10 though including empty child, impossible planet, world enough and time etc but this is likely because they are what i think to be best of the show. Guilty pleasure wise I love the crimson horror, gridlock, night terrors and smile.

From the classic show I find the 3rd doctor era extremely rewatchable because of the fun nature of most of his stories from s8 onwards. While s7 is my favourite classic season, it’s undeniably less rewatchable apart from spearhead from space due to the 7 parters. I like to rewatch carnival of monsters and the daemons personally. Baker has some good ones too such as the pirate planet which i find extremely fun. I haven’t seen much outside of the 3rd or 4th doctor era as I’ve been working my way through from 3 and have nearly finished 4 so far.

So I had a brainstorm at the end of last year. Instead of struggling to get Big Finish new releases (preorders because I like to have a physical CD) throughout the year, I would invest extra money I had at the end of the year into preordering upcoming 2026 releases. No stress, no struggle, order and be done!

I had been collecting 2nd, 3rd, 6th and 9th Doctor audios, since they are my favorite, and I’m not solvent enough to buy all the releases. 🤣

No problem for 2, nor for 3 and definitely not for 6. Yay! However no releases announced for 9. Bit of panic, is Eccelston not doing them anymore?! But don’t worry too much, put some money aside for a later announcement. $500 plus another $150 for any 9th Doctor announcements.

I foolish thought I was done.

Big Finish, somehow knowing of my plans, cackled evilly.

Finally announced 9, except it wouldn’t be in the three story for one format, oh no, 12 stories, priced individually for the next two years. So another $50 on top of what I set aside. 🥵

Then they announced the 13th Doctor in the same format. I didn’t like the writing on her era, but always said I’d check her out if Big Finish did audios for her. Me and my big mouth.

Not to worry, I’ll just pick up the first two, and done.

Crap. I liked them. So another $200 down the drain.

But surely nothing else…Rutans vs. Sontarans. We just did that but backwards. Shouldn’t be a problem…a Second Doctor one, followed by a Sixth Doctor one, and the return of Charley and C’Rizz in the finale.

Darn you Big Finish!

So finally, today, after buying more and more Big Finish throughout the year as they tempt my palate, I put in an order for a replacement to a damaged Avengers audio, and completed both the 9th and the 13th Doctors audio preorders.

Surely I am done. No more surprise audios that I absolutely need for my collection now!

Surely…<whimper>

I came across news of the death of a Disney star by the name of Carla Jeffery.

I look her up on IMDb and she has been in Torchwood in the first episode of Miracle Day, The New World playing Teenage Girl.

TARDIS Wiki on Teenage Girl:

"A teenage girl was interviewed on television after the Miracle Day phenomenon had started in 2011. She was in shock because her brother had been shot repeatedly, yet he was alive and his heart was still beating."