Fellow dads, Soy padre de un pre adolecente creen que sea prudente la circuncisión?

20m with a dad who passed early in my life. I grew up with only women in my life whom I love but feel like I missed out on a lot of milestones with a male fatherly figure. Questions about dating, grooming, career advice, etc. I’m pretty extroverted so would love to hear any dad’s two cents on how to be a good man :)

I will have to do the repairs myself and I feel confused. What tools should I have? What paint should I use? Any advice on the repairs would be appreciated 😩

Im 15f and 2 years ago today my dad left us, im having the worst day and I can't stop crying and thinking about how much I wish I had a dad. Why does he not miss me?

my dad has always been supportive of me, doing sports, doing school, but sometimes he really is kind off tips me off a little?

He has had this one toxic ex we’re just gonna call her orange. He is no longer with orange, but I will say she was extremely abusive, she would constantly hit and try to fight him and throw things almost once a week.

As I don’t think my dad deserved that sometimes I do question him. like one time he was with her he kept calling her fat and talking about how she gained weight

then there’s the other times he talks about how he should be treated like a king and people should follow in his steps. he does own a little business and he does work heard and yea I do agree if he had a partner maybe sometimes they should maybe like make him a bath or something, but not just completely bow down and shit..

He did grow up in a abusive household and his mom was put under those circumstances that some men think are “made for woman” as she would do the cooking cleaning and be the only one caring about the children while his father was a lowkey deadbeat and just bad,

some people have told me it’s just cause I’m Hispanic culture it’s normalized for some people to think woman should be in certain roles but I don’t think it’s okay, I just question like is my dad actually sexist??

and then today was my last straw and why in posting. he was talking about how the government has been lowkey bad and I totally agree but then he suddenly goes

”its because woman keep trying to be bosses of house holds. Im not like that my mind isn’t. men should be the leader and everyone should follow”

im just so confused

When a child is born, a dad has 3 options: first, being a dad but not really being a father, second, actually being a father, or third, leaving. He chose the first option, although I would’ve preferred the third one.

I had a good childhood. I was spoiled with love, toys, and everything I wanted. At least, that’s what I’ve been told, because I don’t remember most of it. The earliest fragments I remember are from when I was around 12 and older.

There were little comments and incidents before this, but I don’t remember them clearly.

The first time I really noticed something was wrong was when I was 14. We were on a trip for a week. We arrived on a Sunday and were leaving on Saturday.

That Thursday morning, my dad became angry at my mother and me for, according to him, “leaving him alone.” We had offered for him to come with us, but he didn’t want to. My mother and I wanted to go explore, so we went.
He became so angry that he even wanted to fly back home, even though we were leaving in two days.

When we returned to our island that night, we still had about an hour and a half of driving to get home. He drove like a maniac, going way over the speed limit. That was the first time I realized that something wasn’t normal. That maybe this family of mine wasn’t as perfect as I thought.
That same night, after we got home, he immediately left and called my mother, playing the victim and saying that I didn’t show love toward him.

My mother asked me why I didn’t love him.
In that moment, I told her why. I told her about the things I had heard him say and the little things I remembered.

That happened on a Saturday. By Tuesday, he had all his stuff out of the house. He told my mother that he was done.
My mother told me that he was leaving, that he wasn’t coming back, that we were going to start fresh, and that she would have to find a job.

Then, the following Monday, all of his stuff was back in the house.

You might think I’m selfish or naive for being hurt by that, but it hurt me. It hurt seeing everything go back to normal, as if nothing had happened. It felt like that entire night and that entire weekend had simply been swept under the rug.

After that, I started writing down every comment, every incident, and everything offensive or wrong that he did or said. I wrote down the date, time, and what happened.

I currently have 12 incidents/comments documented. Two of those are the exact same “sob story” about him leaving and “never coming back,” meaning this has happened to me three separate times.

Three times I’ve had to hear that he’s leaving, that he’s done, and that he’s never coming back.

I’m sick and tired of it. It’s the same thing over and over again. And no, in my opinion, the other incidents I’ve documented aren’t stupid stories.

This whole situation is so hard and complicated because he has provided a lot financially. He paid for my school and bought the majority of the things I have. I recognize that, and I’m grateful for those things.
But I don’t love him. I don’t even like him.
He is disrespectful and inconsiderate. He has caused me a lot of emotional distress. I don’t blame him for every problem I’ve ever had, because I’ve had my own share of bad experiences and problems, but I feel like he has caused a large majority of them.

He drains me every time he’s here because I know he’s going to boss my mother and me around, have an attitude, or make some small comment that ruins the mood.

And if you’re wondering why my mother doesn’t leave him, there are several reasons. She works with him, and he is the main provider. If she leaves, their business would probably go downhill without her. She also grew up without a dad, and she hated that experience.

But in my case, I love it when he isn’t around.
I feel free. I don’t feel judged. I don’t have to deal with the bossiness, the attitudes, or the feeling that some tiny thing I do might lead to another comment.

In all honesty, I just want to become a wealthy woman so that I can retire my mother and give her the ability to leave him if she wants to.

And I don’t know what the proper way to handle this will be when I’m older.

I truly want to go no-contact with him, especially because his other two daughters, my half-sisters, have already done so.

But I also have this weird feeling of guilt because he provided for me financially.
He gave me money, an education, and material things.

But emotionally?
It feels like he gave me money and nothing else.

So I guess my question is: Can you go no-contact with a dad who financially provided for you but wasn’t emotionally there for you? And how do you deal with the guilt that comes with it?

Side note: This is a very vague version of what has happened over the years. I could give more details and share some of the comments/incidents I’ve documented, but I don’t want to make this post extremely long or share too much personal information. Right now, I honestly just need some reassurance that I’m not being a baby or overreacting for feeling this way about my family situation.

I have tried unscrewing the middle white part, and it won’t unscrew :( I even reverse image searched and it said to unscrew it to the left, but it just spins and spins and never comes off? The light in my room has been out for like 2 months and I can not figure this out, I even tried using pliers to tear it off and that didn’t end well either 😭 video in comments

we had an argument over the fan. he talks about saving electricity, and i agree with everything that he said about leaving stuff off.

but the issue is that it gets hot at night, so i have to leave the windows open which makes me get sick easily. mom understands that, he doesn't.

i have an app that checks how much electricity we have left (we use a solar panel). the thing is, in order to get the solar panel to charge more, we have to move it. it's behind the corn maze so it hardly gets any sun during sunrise, and kinda behind the house so it hardly gets any sun at sunset.

this morning i put the fan on because i was sweaty. i'm someone who NEEDS the cold air. he got mad and told me to turn it off because the place isnt hot.

i told him that because he wasn't feeling hot, doesn't mean i don't feel that way. he got mad and walked away, now hes talking to my siblings and not me.

the thing is he's always like this. he's stubborn and thinks he knows everything.

he said that i just wanted to test if it worked. fucking false, i feel HOT. i'm going to SWEAT. i'm a 19 year old adult, not some kid that doesn't listen. plus I'M the one who studied the manual and the app more than anyone else. i know what i'm doing.

edit: yes my dad paid all the bills and the final bill for us to get all this stuff for free. no more rent, no more utility bill, no more water bill, just a cheap food bill. no, i can't move out. i dropped out of hs, and don't have the time or money to go back. i'm not american. I don't live in america. this is also mom's house. mom is okay with me using the fan, she pushed the "keep checking the battery!" mindset into me. dad is just that stubborn. he doesn't care if the battery is on 100%, he doesn't care about me getting less sleep because it's that fucking hot at night, he doesn't care about anything i have to say because "i'm a kid."

I found a vape in my daughter's room while putting away her laundry.

I'm beside myself. Has anyone found themselves in the same situation and can give advice as to how to approach this?. She's been a model daughter, kind, great grades, helpful so although I want to get angry I need advice as to how this should be approached.

Stressed out dad.

I will leave out the smaller details as I don’t think they are relevant, but in this situation as the father, you have been separated from your daughter’s mother since she was 1 1/2. you are completely allowed and physically able to visit your daughters home. I want to know, as a father, if your 15 year old daughter cut off all contact with you via phone (after having pretty regular contact for her whole life), would you go to her home, even just to check if she’s okay? it’s been years and I feel like it’s just proof that he never cared, because if I was in his situation and realised I could no longer contact my daughter over the phone I would go to her house that same day.

I have a 15 year old son. I also have a 19 year old daughter and 11 yo son. But this is specifically about my 15 yo. Let’s call him Fred. His dad will be called Jim and Jim’s current wife is Amber.

I am Mom. So you have some visuals- I have tattoos and prefer t-shirts and gym shorts. Jim works in a public school system and wears athletic wear. Jim also holds a position within the school district where he is constantly interacting with other coaches and parents. I work in a professional office setting for the Government.

When my oldest was two, I broke my back in multiple places and lost a baby. This spiraled some depression in me. It changed Jim and I’s relationship. Fred was a much much wanted baby, and by the time he was walking/talking- he pretty much saw what was left of Jim and i’s strained marriage. I was afraid to leave because of kids. Both of us worked full time and I know of at least one inappropriate relationship Jim had- but by then I didn’t care because I just wanted Jim to respect me. More importantly- I wanted Jim to help the kids respect me.

When Fred was 7 yo, all the kids were in the living room and Jim was about twenty feet away. I asked Fred to go pick up his room. Fred stood up, looked at me and told me I was a “stupid woman”, that I should go away, I was dumb and useless. I responded by crying. Jim heard it all and told me that my tears were “useless- why was I crying.”

Shortly after that I realized I needed to get out of that marriage. My youngest was in soccer and that’s how Jim proceeded to meet his current wife. We were still married, btw.

When Fred was 12, he charged my credit card up to over $3000 on electronic games. His sister told me and I took countermeasures. I also had the boys do extra chores as a disciplinary action. One morning, the chores were not done and I took all gaming equipment away. Fred got mad, started yelling at me and then ended up hitting me. He put his hands around my neck and kneed me in the stomach. His sister responded by telling her Dad and they called CPS on me. She had made the decision that she didn’t want to live with me, and her dad and I were in a tension filled custody battle. Jim made the request to have the kids talk to the Judge. As a result, I became the 1/3/5 weekend parent.

Current situation: Fred is 8 inches taller than me and 30 pounds heavier. Last summer he got upset with me when I wouldn’t buy him a game and called me a “crackhead whore.” He’s flipped over a chair and an end table. But he’s not touched me since the initial incident.

He stole $100 from my purse and although he confessed to his dad, will not discuss it with me. His dad told him he needs to pay me back and told me that I should have Fred do extra chores while he is at my house. When I ask Fred to do extra chores, he gets mad and says that I am fat, old and ugly. That I can’t “pull” a man, that no one loves me and that I have no friends. (Im 110pounds- my friends don’t think I’m fat, old looking or ugly). Fred will tell me that his sister (my daughter) thinks I’m a bully (I’m trying to figure that one out), and that he doesn’t want to be seen with me. He tells me that his dad is the most respected man at his school and that I’m jealous of his dad. He also tells me that his step mom is a better mom than me. She has three kids of her own.

Am I perfect? No. In fact, I have been arrested but the situation was that I was sick- critically so. I was dropping the kids to school when I got into a fender bender. I was trying to get the kids to school so that I could get to the doctor’s. I had cotton mouth and crazy eyes. I was hospitalized two days later with blood/kidney Infections and critically low potassium and magnesium. My ex was granted a TRO while I was in the hospital. The Judge didn’t care what my extenuating circumstances were- I had been charged with a Felony DWI. By that time it was dismissed, the custody battle was over and frankly I was out of money and tears.

I am trying to keep in my thoughts that my 15 yo is still a child but his words hurt. He seems to know exactly where to hurt me and I try to stay strong by not crying and not reacting. Occasionally I do get angry as I get tired of him telling me how ugly I am.

Please tell me- is there any hope for us? I fear the day he’s an adult and treats a woman like this- but maybe he really does just hate me? I have not introduced other men into our lives as i didn’t want those types of complications.

Thank you.

I’m 16, boy, and my relationship with my dad has always been somewhat strained. We’re very different people, with very different personalities, interests, and views on things, and there seems to be a certain amount of friction whenever we spend time together.

I’m much closer to my mum. She and I are very similar and seem to understand each other very naturally. My brothers, meanwhile, have more in common with my dad, and I think he finds it easier to connect with them. I think it’s perfectly natural for parents to have different relationships with different children, just as children can naturally gravitate towards one parent more than the other.

My dad also works a great deal, so I understand that his time and energy are limited. I don’t expect him to spend every spare moment with me or to take an interest in everything I like. The difficult part is that he rarely seems willing to participate in the things that matter to me because he finds them boring, like art, literature and classical music. I understand that not everything can happen on my terms, and I don’t want to come across as entitled or spoiled. I just wish that, occasionally, he would be willing to do something simply because it makes me happy, even if it isn’t something he personally enjoys.

Recently things have become even more complicated. About two weeks ago I told my dad that I like boys. It was quite frightening for me to tell him, he is quite conservative in his opinions and he and his friends have a tendency to make homophobic jokes from time to time. I genuinely had no idea how he would react.

He went quiet for a while and eventually just said, “Okay.”
Not certain what that means. Perhaps he was simply surprised. Perhaps he needs time to process it. Perhaps he doesn’t know what to say. I honestly don’t know.
But since I told him, we’ve barely spoken.

That hurts because despite all the difficulties between us, I genuinely want a relationship with my dad. I want to be close to him. I want him to know who I am and to take an interest in my life. I want to be able to spend time with him without feeling as though we’re constantly getting on each other’s nerves.

At the same time, I find being around him quite exhausting sometimes. In my opinion, he struggles with empathy and emotional communication, and I often feel as though he doesn’t really understand where I’m coming from. I know that’s only my perspective, though, and I’m sure there are things about the situation that I don’t understand from his side.

I know my dad works hard. I know he has his own interests, personality, and limitations. I know that I can’t expect him to be exactly like my mum or to have the same relationship with me that she does. But I still find myself wondering whether I’m somehow doing something wrong.

Should I be making more of an effort to meet him halfway? Should I be trying harder to find things we have in common?
I sometimes feel that a parent-child relationship ought to accommodate the child to some extent. But perhaps that’s an unfair way of looking at it.

I’m not looking for my dad to be perfect. I don’t expect him to suddenly become interested in all my hobbies, agree with all my opinions, or understand me as well as my mum does. I just want to feel that he is willing to meet me somewhere in the middle.

I genuinely have never hated a man more then i do my dad, I tried to think of one good moment ive had with him. Not one moment pops in my head, im turning 18 but ever since I was little. I remember him just being an angry man, he always downgrades me. Calls me fat, cow, ugly, disgusting lazy etc since I could talk. Just constantly is yelling at me, when I was (12-till i got a job) I would clean the house pretty much everyday, from the dishes to vacuuming to doing EVERY single peoples laundry. They would leave the house so messy at times on purpose, and I would get mad and say “im not cleaning all this up” and they would just laugh knowing I would. I have 3 older brothers who would never clean up after themselves, they would watch me clean while they would be playing there game or eating. And he has the audacity to call me lazy, im the only one out of my brothers who has a job. The oldest being 21 mind you, he gets mad when I would take a piece of bread from the pantry. And make it a whole deal out of it, saying “who said you could eat my food” even though I give money to them every week. He would genuinely yell so much at me then the next day he would be trying to make me laugh, its getting to a point i dont if i can handle anymore of it.

My uncle molested me as a child and it caused a lot of trouble in my life.

I told my mom about this, but she didn't tell my father, because she thought he would kill my uncle. He was on steroids at the time. He was very mean and aggressive, so I don't see her conclusion being an overextrapolation. But is that not a reasonable reaction for a father anyways?

My dad and I has always had a strained relationship, though better now. I always thought he fulfilled the non-monetary role of fatherhood very poorly. But, I wonder if my mom told my father what had happened and let him react as a father should, would I have felt differently about our relationship.

He still doesn't know. I don't know if I should tell him, because it would rehash beef between him and my mom that was solved a decade ago. They are are cordial now. I am grateful for that and don't want to blow up the peace.

Should I tell him?

Why?

So proud I taught myself how to use a grease gun! But all the tutorials stop after the grease is delivered

It seems like they should be stored "tip down?" Can I store it under pressure?

Hello! Currently trying to build something alone for the first time (bathroom cupboard). I’m mostly winging it because even the instructions don’t make too much sense to me but I don’t think I’ve done anything wrong yet. Just a bit confused on what those little wooden cylinders are for (google is calling them wooden dowels)? They’re really loose and keep falling out of the pre-drilled holes. Do I need glue? And if I do, does it have to be a specific kind of glue? Is it expensive? Thank you!!

ive never had any male parental figures in my life so ending up like this was bound to happen i guess, what would you do or how would you react if you found out that someone who is 18 is madly in love with you? I cant seem to forget or get over him its been about 2 months and its eating me alive

I know by the title it probably sounds fucked up, but I have my reasons. And honestly, I don’t even know if I’m wrong for feeling this way anymore.
I feel like I need to give some background because this isn’t just about what happened recently.
My mom is an immigrant from a very small town in Mexico. She came here when she was around 23 or 24 and eventually got a job and started building a life here. She met my dad when she was in her mid-20s, and apparently the first few years of their relationship were good. But eventually, he became extremely abusive toward her, both mentally and physically.
He would tell my mom and my sister that they couldn’t survive without him, that if they left he would send my mom back to Mexico, and that nobody else would ever want her. He would constantly verbally abuse her and make her feel worthless. I remember being really young and hearing screaming, things being slammed into walls, seeing holes in the walls, and seeing bruises on my mom and sister. He would take their belongings and throw them outside.
Eventually they got married and had my brother, who’s only a year older than me. My dad also developed serious problems with alcohol and drugs. He’s somewhat better with that now, but it’s still part of his history.
Eventually my parents divorced, and my dad reported my mom for something—I honestly don’t even remember exactly what it was—but she ended up being sent back to Mexico for about a year. I didn’t see my mom during that time, and I remember being extremely upset about it. I was a kid and didn’t understand why my family was being torn apart.
As I got older, I started seeing even more of who my dad really was. He would tell me and my brother that we didn’t love him, that we wanted him dead, and that we should basically just leave him because we hated him. Obviously hearing stuff like that from your own parent messes with your head.
There was also an incident where I told him I wanted to go back to my mom’s house. He physically dragged me out of my bed and into the hallway. I called my sister crying, she called the police, and the police talked to me but ultimately made me stay with my dad.
When I was 13, my dad was working on a construction job. He rented a trailer and a Bobcat, and there was an accident where he was seriously injured. He spent months in a wheelchair and his business basically fell apart.
While all of that was happening, he disappeared from our lives for about two and a half years. My brother and I came home from the bus stop one day and he wasn’t there to pick us up. We kept calling him, and eventually he told us he was in South Carolina living with his mother, who he constantly talks badly about. We ended up staying with our mom for those two and a half years.
During that time, he also got back in contact with his own father, who had abandoned him when he was around 11. He hadn’t seen him in over two decades. Their relationship seems incredibly fucked up too. His father eventually stole my dad’s laptop containing his work and left him stranded after my dad refused to buy him a new car.
I honestly wonder if some of my dad’s behavior comes from the way he was raised. I’m not saying having a shitty childhood automatically makes someone abusive, because plenty of people go through horrible things and don’t treat their children this way. But my dad clearly has unresolved issues with his own family, especially his father. He was abandoned by him as a kid, then decades later reconnects with him, only for their relationship to become toxic again. I think there’s probably a lot of anger, resentment, and other things he’s never dealt with.
But understanding where his behavior comes from doesn’t make it okay.
Eventually my dad came back into our lives. I was honestly so happy. I felt like I finally had my dad back after missing him for years and missing so many things in my life because he wasn’t there.
And then he basically went right back to being the same person.
He’s still mentally abusive and has been physically aggressive. He makes me feel like shit, calls me names, tells me I’m stupid, and says horrible things about me and my siblings. He tells me I have to do all the housework because I’m a woman. He bought my brother a brand-new BMW but couldn’t even be bothered to help me get my permit or practice driving with me.
He constantly asks me for money too. I recently quit my job, and he’s still asking me for money even though I’m young and don’t have much of it. He doesn’t ask my brother nearly as much. He’ll tell me that because I’m his daughter, I should be willing to help him.
He also lies constantly. He told me he bought the house we’re living in, but it’s actually rented. He lies about what he tells my mom. He has made fake phone numbers to harass her and call her names and tell her she needs to go back to Mexico.
And this isn’t just limited to my mom. He has called my sister horrible names and told her she needs to die. He’s screamed at me and my brother over stupid things. I have videos of him screaming and cussing us out.
A few days ago, we got into a huge argument because I said I’d rather watch my nephew for the day than sit around doing nothing. He started banging on my door and calling me horrible names. He even damaged my door. At one point he was lying on the floor pretending to cry, which honestly just made the entire situation feel even more manipulative.
He’s also sold things belonging to me and my brother because he didn’t have money to pay bills. He sold my brother’s Xbox and my PlayStation. And I’m just sitting there thinking, weren’t you telling everyone you had millions of dollars?
That’s another huge thing with him. He constantly talks about how much money he has, but his actions don’t match that. I saw his bank statements, and he had around $500,000, which was millions less than what he had told me and my brother. He wastes money, he’s unemployed, sold his car, and relies on my brother for rides.
He also got arrested recently.
My dad had been harassing his father’s fourth wife because of money he apparently owed her. He emailed her and threatened her. Two days later, my dad picked me and my brother up from school, and when we got home there were like eight police cars around the house looking for him. I had to watch my dad get arrested right in front of me.
He got out about a week later, but now he potentially faces around nine months in jail.
And honestly? Part of me thinks he deserves the consequences.
I don’t WANT my dad to go to jail because I hate him and want his life ruined. I think I want him to face consequences because nothing else seems to make him realize that his behavior has consequences.
He’s had years of chances. He’s had people leave him. He’s lost relationships with his kids. He’s had problems with alcohol and drugs. He’s had problems with the law. He’s been abusive toward my mom, my sister, me and my brother. And somehow he always seems to find a way to make himself the victim.
And that’s probably what hurts me the most.
I feel like I finally got my dad back after he was gone for two and a half years, and I really wanted to believe that he had changed. I wanted to have a normal relationship with my dad. Instead, it feels like I’m watching the same cycle happen all over again.
I know there’s probably a lot more to this than what I’ve written. This isn’t even half of everything that’s happened, and I’m still pretty young, so I obviously don’t know everything about my family’s history.
But from everything I’ve experienced, I genuinely believe my dad has serious issues that he refuses to deal with. Maybe some of that comes from his relationship with his own father. Maybe some comes from his addiction, his childhood, or whatever else he’s gone through. I don’t know.
But at some point, your past can explain your behavior without excusing it. so..? for thinking that my dad deserves to go to jail is that bad

Im buying my first car, its a 2011 Mazda Mazda3 if you were wondering. The seller is handing me the vin number before i have even looked at it in person, so im happy about that. But how do i register a car? how do i go about transferring a title? Im in Utah and we have weird business hours and tax laws. What do i need to work out with the seller, and then what do I need to do myself? Please help! Super excited but my parents are not supportive of this choice to get a car this young, even though i can afford it.

Does going out somewhere with your father mean the same for everyone ? Like you went, ate something good, clicked some photos while your father is just either talking on the call or telling you to hurry ?

So this is my first time posting on Reddit so sorry if there is any useless info I’m sorry but I really need advice from someone that isn’t family
I f15 have always had a toxic/bad relationship with my bio dad. My parents have separated/divorced since I was 2.
My bio dad is not a good person,and this isn’t just from my perspective either. Growing up or At least when I was really young he had alot of gf’s growing up until he met my step mom (they are no longer together after he abandoned her and my other siblings on that side)
I love my stepmom she’s been in my life for along time but when she first moved in it was hard bc I was anxious little kid and my bio dad would get mad I was anxious around her so it was never ending cycle. But let me stop yapping and get into why i posted this in the first place.
The last I saw my bio dad when was I was 12 in the 6th grade in may but I hadn’t been to his actual house since November that year.
I had blocked him i believe when I was 13 due to how anxious and I would have panic attacks every time he texted me due to the fact every time i went over to his house it would end up him screaming at me over anything,but he had to go through my mom for any contact . But now i accepted he’s not my dad bc he’s never acted like one. He first reached on Father’s Day this year I don’t remember fully the message but it went along the lines of he loves me and blah blah. But recently he’s been texting me on fb (I didn’t even realize he was my spam) and added me as friend,I haven’t accepted it yet and don’t plan on it. He also keeps posting me on fb (older pictures of when I was younger) and I don’t know how to handle this,bc I already got over the grief of losing him (yes I understand he’s not dead but we can still grief over other people that are still living) and I dont think I feel comfortable starting a relationship again with my bio dad but any advice helps bc I don’t know if I should just ignore him or tell him to please leave me alone?

So I'm 22f and feel like I should have my life together more , I live alone but I'm in debt due to loosing my job I have a new one now but the pays weird so it will end up me having to go into more debt for rent before I'm payed and I'll be in about 1500 pounds worth of debt , it's stressful and I feel like a failure...what do I do ...is there anything I can do or do I just have to ride out the next few months with no money basically